Elmer Studios presents...
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Yet more Elmer-from-the-future wackiness abounds here in episode 101 as
we go back to the future for the second installment of BG Change with the
Amazing Michelle and her amazing Nanites! 

Bubblegum Crisis - Mega Tokyo Change is copyright Peter Withers
Bubblegum Crisis is copyright Artmic/Youmex.
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[The scene - a well furnished apartment, with two couches in an L formation
in front of a large cabinet that includes a wide-screen TV and video
recorder. The apartment has a few doors to who-knows-where, and a small
kitchenette. A coffee table sits in front of the two couches, and a desk,
home to a well-equipped PC sits off to one side. There are two Silver
Mallies resting on the bench in front of the kitchenette. Out the window, a
huge city filled with art-deco skyscrapers can be seen, along with the odd
blimp going by]

[The apartment is much cleaner - most of the dust is gone, the couches have
been tidied up and the carpet has been thoroughly vacuumed. There are
several boxes spread out in the room. Terry is rummaging through the
kitchenette and Sean is looking through the boxes.]

Sean: Man, just look at some of this junk.
Terry: Uh... Sean? You won't believe what I just found here.
Sean: [Peers into kitchenette] What is it?
Terry: It's some kind of small, cylindrical thing with a bamboo cane.
Sean: Oh, that? that's one of those electronic monks. Never seen them before?
Terry: Nope. So what's it doing here?
Sean: Beats me.

[Katherine enters from one of the side rooms carrying a large box]

Katherine: And you won't believe some of what I found.
Terry: Ooh! Do tell!
Katherine: [Puts down the box and rummages through it] One of my mother's old
black flightsuits. Never thought I'd see one of those. A whole lot of
expended bullet casings.
Sean: I'd rather not think about that myself.
Katherine: An over-sized metal sledgehammer, wonder where that came from, an
old Beast Wars Inferno toy and a really ratty plastic christmas tree that
looks like someone ran it over with a truck.
Eiji: [V/O] And from the looks of things, this place has a super crushing
press installed!
Terry: Eiji? Where the heck are you?

[There are sounds of struggling, then Eiji pops up from behind the forwards
facing couch in a cloud of dust.]

Eiji: Just been seeing what's down here.
Terry: Wonderful, and we just vacuumed the place.
Eiji: Yeah, but wait till you see what I found.

[He clambers out, carrying an armload of rubbish]

Eiji: Let's see... We've got a shapeshifter Raiu toy that goes from not-quite-
human to not-nearly-dragon modes and has a mutant head; an EVA-05 sock puppet;
an empty Soylent Cola can; a tourist map of Dudleyville; a copy of the
"Evangelion Uberkid Soundtrack"; an evil black furby that's muttering
something about being the lord of darkness; and a copy of the "Battle Nun
Arabella" video. In fact, a whole lot of them.
Sean: That is some seriously strange rubbish.
Eiji: No kidding. [He dumps it in a heap on the floor]
Terry: Eiji! We just cleaned that.
Eiji: Well sorry.
Katherine: I'm sure as heck not picking that junk up.
Sean: Hey, if we had some of Michelle's nanites, they could clean it. Those
little blighters can do everything.
Terry: They can't do *everything.*
Sean: Sure they can. I mean, they rebuilt Michelle, turned her into a Japanese
teenager, hacked through the ADPs computers, built her amazing gauntlets and
let her get blown up.
Katherine: He's got a point.
Eiji: Yeah, I'm sure that cleaning an old apartment would be a breeze for them.
Terry: Cleaning an apartment? Heck, laying a four lane highway at a mile a
minute would be easy for them!
Katherine: Now you're getting silly.
Sean: And what's a mile, anyway? [Terry shrugs]
Voice: Good morning all.
Eiji: And hello to you, Nanite Bob.
Voice: What? Not you too.
Katherine: Voice, from what my mum said no-one gave you any respect so we sure
as heck won't.
Terry: Come on, go easy on the senile old twit.
Voice: Well, I've got the next chapter of BGChange for you-
Terry: Forget I said that.
Voice: So if you'd care to take your seats?

[They sit - Eiji and Katherine facing the TV, Terry and Sean on the sideways couch.]

Katherine: For those of you who came in late, thanks to being bitten by a
radioactive Deus Ex Machina Michelle has been able to build a near-monomolecular
sword and blow stuff up real good. Oh yeah, and she dumped Vince Russo.

[The TV flickers for a bit, then switches on]

> Michelle woke up blindfolded and her hands were bandaged.

Eiji: She found this situation to be somewhat arousing.

> The sensation from the 
> nanites was that they had been burned severly and they were attempting to make 
> repairs.

Sean: They also smelt like burnt toast.
Terry: Warning: Excessive use of nanites will void your warranty.

> She could also feel several of her ribs mending slowly.

Katherine: Why doesn't she just get the nanites to do everything for her?
Sean: Out of nanites? Get the nanites to make you some. Can't get there? Have
them make you a car. Hell, I'm sure the nanites could contrive Genom off her
back.

> She heard someone off to one side. 

Terry: Psst... you guys got the corkscrews yet?
Eiji: Corkscrews? I thought we were going to use the hamster.

> "Hello. Is someone there?" 

Terry: No one here but us lurkers.

> "Don't worry girl, you'll be alright.

Katherine: Despite all evidence to the contrary.

> Whatever type of nanites you have in your system saved your hands.

Sean: It's merely a matter of were you want them saved...

> It'll take them a few days to fix your hands up enough 
> so you can move them some." To Michelle, the voice sounded like an older man who 
> was probably around her age or a little older.

Terry: So is that her real "50+" age, her assumed "late teens" age, or what?

> A doctor. 

Sean: Who?
Katherine: Exactly.
Sean: What doctor?
Katherine: Not what, Who.
Sean: That's what I want to know. Who is the doctor?
Katherine: Exactly!
Eiji: Alright, we concede to your knowledge of cult British sci-fi. Now shut up.

> "My gauntlets. . ." 
> "Pretty much scrap."

Terry: Then they blew up.

> A cool female voice came from somewhere across the room. 
> "Damn. The energy feedback must have fried them as well as my hands.

Katherine: They blew up real good.

> Guess I was 
> lucky though. Thank you for pulling me out of there. That is if you're not 
> Genom." 

Terry: [Woman] Oh, Genom? No, no, not us at all, no way. Are you sure she can't
see anything?

> "The Knight Sabers." Michelle could sense the truth coming from the woman's 
> voice. 

Sean: The nanites built her a lie detector.

> "Then thank you. If you would like, I can assist you in any way I can." 

Eiji: [Michelle] Can I build myself a super hardsuit and show you all up? Please?

> "First, who are you." 

Katherine: [Woman] And where did my question mark go?

> "Getting down to business, aren't you.

Eiji: With a bound and blindfolded woman at the mercy of the Knight Sabres... I
wanna watch. [Katherine hits him with a cushion]

> If I do that, can I see your face then." 
> "I think about it." Michelle thought about it for a moment and told the nanites 
> to cut the diguise to her face.

Terry: So she can just nanite on, nanite off like that? Damn, these things are useful.

> Her face blurred and changed back to normal along with her figure. 

Katherine: [Michelle] Nothing fits any more.

> "You're Ashley Winters."

Terry [Michelle]: Yes! No! Um... What was the question?

> It wasn't a question. 
> "Yes and no.

Terry: Thank you for the clear and concise answer.

> Why don't you tell me about my systems if you could.

Sean: Well, they're tiny little robots that make stuff, and they talk in this
high-pitched squeaksqueaksqueak voice.

> I would like 
> to know what you found out. It would be mostly new information for me." 

Eiji: Just admit it, you don't know anything.

> The voice seemed to pause for a moment. "The boundries between your 
> cyborg/boomer components are only seen on the cellular level.

Sean: So from this, he's half cyborg and half boomer?
Eiji: Yeah... I think.
Terry: She's part man, part machine, part cyborg and part telephone box. But
mostly phone box.

> There are 
> boomerlike components and structual strength increases in your bones, joints, 
> and muscles.

Katherine: You can also pick up AM radio. Must be noisy in there.

> Your eyes have been replaced. There are many times the normal 
> concentration of nanites in your body.

Katherine: So what is the *normal* concentration of nanites in someone's body?
Terry: Er, none.
Katherine: So what's many times none?
Terry: None!

> Most of the cybernetic systems are parellel in construction to the 33-S buma." 

Sean: Which arern't cybernetic and are in fact syntheses of human organs. Thank you!

> Michelle sighed a bit as the blindfold was removed from her eyes. She didn't 
> turn her head.

Sean: [Michelle] No, this couch is far more interesting than you guys anyway.

> "As far as I can tell, my cybernetics aren't being supplimented 
> by the nanites. The nanites have created and are being supplimented by the 
> cybernetics." 

Katherine: So the nanites created the cybernetics which supplied the nanites? That
just doesn't make any sense.

> "Interesting. But where did you come from?" 

Terry: [Michelle] My mum.
Katherine: [Woman] I mean, where are you from?
Terry: [Michelle] Iowa.
Katherine: [Woman] I mean, where did you get your powers from?

> "An accident as far as I can tell." 
> "Really?" 

Sean: She was bitten by a radioactive Deus Ex Machina.

> "My name isn't Ashley Winters. It's Michelle Grey." 
> "What! That would mean your over fifty." Another voice said.
> Michelle could tell it was Priss. 

Eiji: Remind me, how does Priss know Michelle?
Terry: Y'know, just does.

> (She's a Knight Saber.) 
> Michelle's voice was wry and she smiled slightly, "I look pretty good for my 
> age, don't you think?" 

Sean: Big deal. Half of Hollywood are over fifty and look younger than you.

> A few days later - 

Katherine: After dumping the body.
Terry: Dark, aren't we?

> Michelle gently unwrapped her hands.

Katherine: [Michelle] Just as I expected. Four fingers and a thumb.

> The serious 2nd degree burns were gone. All 
> that was left was a bit of tenderness that felt similar to that of her ribs. 

Sean: [Michelle] Worthless nanites, can't even heal critical injuries in mere days.

> "How are you feeling Miss Grey." Sylia asked. 

Terry: [Michelle] I feel like a new toothbrush.
Sean: [Michelle] I feel like I've just gained cosmic powers, killed myself, been
reborn, turned evil, died again, been cloned, regained cosmic powers, died again
and been replaced by a duplicate from an alternate universe.
Katherine: That's Michelle Grey, not Jean Grey.
Sean: I knew that.

> "Better Miss Stingray, much better. Obviously you wanted to talk to me about 
> something else rather than keeping your secrets." 
> "Are you interested in joining my operation?" 

Eiji: [Michelle] Finally! An inexplicable love interest of my very own!

> Without much of a pause, Michelle said quietly, "Yes, I would like to join you 
> in taking down Genom. Very interested indeed." 
> Michelle followed Sylia out into the hardsuit labs and gave her the basic tour. 

Eiji: Including the honeymoon sweet.
Terry: [Sylia] This is the hardsuit lab, where I make hardsuits. This is Mackie's
bedroom. Note all the peepholes.
Katherine: [Sylia] Of course, having nothing but Priss' word to go on, we're going
to expose all our vital secrets to you, even though you could easily betray us.

> Michelle studied the hardsuits with more than a bit of interest.

Sean: [Michelle] Why do they all have high heels anyway?

> "What would you like me to do, in my capacity?" 
> "Redesigning the hardsuits and other duties." 

Terry: Because Sylia's designs aren't good enough! We need the unholy power of
Michelle and her near-monomolecular sword.

> "Fighting also." Michelle's voice dared Sylia to make an arguement of that 
> statement.

Katherine: [Sylia] Okay Michelle, I want you to fight with us.
Terry: [Michelle] Hah, then I won't! Wait a sec...

> She would be going no matter what happened. 
> "I'll be designing your hardsuit with your imput of course." 

Terry: Naturally, all must defer to Michelle's will! Bow down before me,
peons! Bow!
Katherine: You're scaring me.

> "Good. Maybe before then, you would like to give tests to satisfy your 
> curiousity about my abilities." 

Eiji: Know what I mean, eh?

> Testing - 
> Michelle speared her hand outward at her rapidly moving opponent as she tried to 
> hit it's vulnerable spot. The opponent moved out of the way like a ghost and 
> struck back at her. She dodged and nailed the point with a front kick.

Eiji: [Deadpan] So the nanites gave her inherent fighting skills too?
Terry: Yeah, but the best they could do was Samo Hung from "Fist of Death" so she
has to fight with her front teeth protruding.
Katherine: You do realise that absolutely no-one will get that?
Terry: So?

> After a 
> moment, the hologram disappeared and she wiped the sweat out of her eyes. She 
> attempted to regain her breath as she waited for the next opponent to appear. 

Sean: Little did she know that the holodeck was about to run amok and disengage
all the safety protocols *again.*

> "That is enough for now." A cool voice came from outside the room. 
> "Thanks." Michelle stumbled out of the room and into the changing room. 
> Sylia glanced over the data as Linna watched with a bit of awe and almost fear. 

Terry: [Linna] Power level one million? That's impossible!

> Sylia looked up at Linna, "She has the equivalent of a Level 5 training but her 
> speed and her reflexes are over five times that of what was computed for someone 
> of her body type.

Katherine: "She's very fast."

> The strength tests indicate three times her normal strength. 

Eiji: [Priss] Hey Sylia, can I have a turn telling everyone how wonderful Michelle is?

> The readings also indicate she has a sizable reserve

Katherine: Reserve of... What?
Terry: Cream buns. Nene's been wondering where hers went.

> and that all those readings 
> are increasing slowly even this long after she said she was first affected." 

Sean: Continual mutation courtesy of gamma radiation!

> "Are you still considering having her join us?" 
> "Yes I am. So far she has passed all of the tests, including the lie detectors 
> and truth serums.

All: [Bored] Nanites.

> Even so, I am preparing certain measures in case she turns out to be dangerous." 

Sean: General Sylia Lightfoot is forming her unit... the Nanite Busters!

> Michelle listened to the faint voices in the changing room and shuddered 
> slightly. She would have to make her own plans in case the Knight Sabers decided 
> she was a dangerous liability.

Katherine: [Michelle] Of course, I'll have to kill them all and dispose of the
bodies.
Eiji: And all those considerations Sylia really should have thought of rather than
blindly trusting the stranger with the unlimited abilities.

> She gathered her hair in a ponytail and walked 
> out of the room. "So, how did my tests go boss." 

Terry: [Sylia] Pretty well, except you flunked medieval plumbing.

> "You show all the predicted abilities determined by the study of your 
> enhancements. Except for one thing." 

Eiji: [Sylia] You're a man!

> "Which was." Michelle looked a bit worried. 
> "Your bodily changes aren't merely on a physical level according to the tests. 
> The changes that have occured are down to your genetic level. In all physical 
> ways, you are

Sean: Apparently a three-banded armadillo.

> in your mid-twenties." 

Katherine: Okay, so you're someone in their mid-twenties who is super-strong,
super-fast, super-tough *and* has a mutant healing factor...

> "My word." Michelle considered this almost in shock. ::That would explain the 
> feelings I've been having.

Terry: [Michelle, distraught] I've been going through puberty again!

> I thought they were just to blend in better, but 
> their totally normal for someone in my apparent physical age.:: 
> //Query? Distress detected. Reason?// 

Sean: [Michelle] What have you guys done to me?
Eiji: [Nanites] We're bored, okay? Nanites need some fun too, you know.

> ::You changed me down to my genetic level. That's why.:: 

Katherine: It took her this long to be worried? Weren't the hairy palms enough of
a giveaway?

> //Distressed? Followed through with objectives. Objectives couldn't be met if 
> modifications were done on a physical level. Modification on a genetic level are 
> neccessary to meet objectives.// 

Sean: What objectives are those precisely?
Eiji: Something Michelle will never have the brains to ask about.
Katherine: Remember, the nanites are your friend. Oh sure, they invaded your body,
rebuilt you from the ground up without asking and are still doing god-knows-what
to you, but they're you're friends. No, really!
Terry: These are some awfully rude nanites.

> ::You surprised me. That is why I'm upset.:: 

Sean: [Michelle] That and I lost my "Fatso the fat-assed wombat" pin.
Terry: Sean, no-one is *ever* going to get that.
Sean: I don't care! I wanted a "Fatso the fat-assed wombat."

> //Modification of routine. Modifications will be notified before begun.// 
> //yes/no// 
> ::Yes. Please display changes done.:: What seemed like a mental viewscreen came 
> up in Michelle's mental eye. 

Sean: Hey look, she's getting mental cable.

> //Genetic changes done, objective camoflage. Addition of cybernetic systems in 
> physical assitance, enhancement of eyes, reinforcement of bone and ligament 
> structures with metal alloy,

Eiji: [Michelle] Where did you get the material for this anyway?
Terry: [Nanites] That's none of your damn business.

> addition of armor between lipid layer and vulnerable internal organs.

Sean: Elimination of the pancreas.
Eiji: [Michelle] stupid pancreas, never did me any good.
Katherine: What's any of this got to do with comoflauge?

> 72% of enhancements complete.// 

Terry: They're yet to start laying the new carpet.

> "Are you alright, Miss Grey." Michelle snapped out of it. 

Terry: [Michelle] I think the nanites are trying to re-upholster me.

> "I'm sorry, what did you say?" 
> "I was wondering if you had any place to stay." 
> "I've got a place near the canyons. It isn't much, but it's private and free. 

Katherine: [Michelle] Okay, so it's a run-down hovel, but it's my run-down hovel.
Eiji: [Priss] Can I move in? Your hovel's way nicer than mine.

> And if you would, please call me Michelle or Ashley." 

Sean: Can't you just pick an identity and stick with it?

> "I will be setting up training sessions for you with Linna. Is there any 
> particular time you can do so?" 

Sean [Michelle]: Let's see... I'm busy being unemployed most days. Can we go for
the weekend? I've got a day off from doing nothing then.

> "Any time available. I'll make the time. It has been pretty hard to try to learn 
> fighting from videos and remembering SCA

Sean: Southern Cross Army?
Terry: Small Canines Association?

> practices."

Eiji: Come on, no-one learns martial arts just by watching movies.

> Sylia almost smiled at the 
> thought. "Thank you Miss Stingray, I will try not to disappoint you." Michelle 
> walked out of the room. 
> Practicing with Linna - 

Eiji: So that's what she's calling it.

> Michelle groaned as she pryed herself off of the floor. It had been the fifth 
> time in ten minutes. She hadn't realized just how much she depended on her 
> enhanced speed when fighting until she turned it off.

Terry: So she's got a super power on/off switch? And why'd she switch it off anyway?

> She wiped the sweat off 
> her brow and concentrated again on her opponent. ::She looks so damn relaxed 
> while I'm getting my ass kicked.:: Michelle dropped into a basic defensive 
> stance. 

Katherine: What, begging on her knees?
Sean: Yeah, the good old crouching tiger stance.

> She managed to dodge the first stike and slide out of the way of the second. She 
> even managed to counter, even though it was easily blocked. Then the world 
> turned upside down again and she hit the mat hard. 

Sean: Is it wrong to cheer that Michelle's at a humility lesson?
Katherine: You watch, it won't last.

> Linna had to smile as Michelle let out a faint groan and mock twitched slightly. 

> "You are enjoying this, aren't you." Michelle said almost accusenly, though with 
> a bit of humor as she stuggled to her feet. Linna smiled a bit wider as she 
> walked over to the prone woman. She reached down to grasp her hand, then gasped 
> as she was thrown over Michelle and rolled onto the mat.

Sean: [Linna] I can fly...

> "Now that felt good." 
> Michelle admitted with a smile as she got up. She reached down and easily pulled 
> Linna up. Linna tried the same move but couldn't even get Michelle to budge. 

Terry: Even though she's had her ass handed to her, Michelle is still better than
Linna! Nay, 'tis true, I say!

> "So how is your suit coming along."

Katherine: [Michelle] It should be back from the dry-cleaner's any day now.
 
> "Sylia says that it should take another week or so to complete. Except for my 
> gauntlets and coloring, I've been staying out of the way." 

Sean: [Michelle] I was going to colour it neon orange with bright green highlights,
but Sylia vetoed me.

> "What does it look like?" 
> "It's a silver-grey color and sort've looks like a mix of your suit, Priss', and 
> Sylia's.

Katherine: [Michelle] I've optimised my suit with the best features of each of
yours, so as to show you all up at once. Except Nene, but no-one cares about her anyway.

> Sylia said I would be able to go on a mission in a few weeks." 
> "That's means we'll have to train even harder until then." 
> Michelle glared at the younger woman and sighed softly.

Eiji: [Michelle] I don't mind training with you, Linna. You have a gentle touch.

> It was going to be a long couple of weeks. 
> A couple of weeks later - 

Terry: Well that was convenient.

> "Down!" The shout went out as the boomer opened fire. Lasers flashed out and one 
> officer yelled out as it struck him.

Sean: Oh look, there goes poor old trooper 28. Again.

> Leon winced at the sight of the body flying 
> back and hitting the armored van. He prepared to call a retreat when he saw 
> several familar hardsuits coming onto the scene. 

Terry: [Leon] Okay guys, pack it up. We're not needed here anymore.

> "The Knight Sabers. I wondered when they would show up. And it looks like 
> they've got someone new." 
> The fifth hardsuit seemed to be

Katherine: -Styled like a suit of medieval armour.
Sean: -Bright red and designed for a male pilot.
Terry: -Green and purple and monstrously armed.
Eiji: -Had prominent hip-mounted guns.

> a light grey-silver color and seemed similar in design to the green and blue one.

Sean: There isn't a green and blue hardsuit.

> The only feature that made it stand out was 
> it's slightly over sized gauntlets that surrounded her hands and lower arms. 

Terry: Yes, gauntlets usually do.

> They were quite familar to the Inspector, since he had seen them before on a 
> woman carrying a child. 

Katherine: Oh look, our mysterious super-human has joined the Knight Sabres. What
a startling revelation that was.

> "I guess they got some more help now." Leon watched as the new Saber dodged 
> around the boomer, trying to avoid it more than the other Knight Sabers. She 
> managed to get a few hits in though even if it seemed she was off. 
> Michelle was having a few minor difficulties with her hardsuit.

Terry: It made this really annoying squeaking noise.

> Even though it 
> worked right, the suit's response time was off for her. It was her own enhanced 
> reaction time that was causing this particular problem. It made the suit seem as 
> though it had a noticable time lag. 

Katherine: Naturally, Sylia's technology isn't good enough for Michelle's all-round
amazingness.

> //Make adjustments?// 
> ::Yes:: 

Eiji: Once again, it's the amazing nanites to the rescue.
Terry: The nanites carry this fic.

> She felt as though her senses were back to normal as though she wasn't wearing 
> the suit. Michelle grinned under her helmet and she flashed forward near her 
> normal speed.

Katherine: Nothing about Michelle's normal.

> She dodged the boomer's fist and punched upward, firing both her 
> gauntlets when it was knocked back. The boomer's chest melted quite nicely and 
> it got blown back, temporarily ko'ed. The other Knight Sabers destroyed it in a 
> hail of railgun spikes and lasers. Michelle gave it the finishing decapitation. 

Sean: So let me get this straight. She needed to decapitate it even though it had
already been finished off? Why?
Terry: Oh, the massive, gaping holes in its chest only looked fatal.

> "No fair, she got this one!" Michelle smiled at Priss' tone. 
> "First come, first serve singer." She quipped back. "One moment." Michelle 
> walked over to Leon. 
> "Are you and your men okay Inspector." 
> "We're fine. . .

Katherine: [Leon] Except for number 28 who's lying in a puddle of his own gore,
but that always happens.

> Monica." Michelle winced and pulled up her face visor. She 
> ignored Sylia's protests not to do so. 

Terry: Stuff you, boss. I'm going to do what I want.

> "Got me there Inspector." She smiled softly and brought a gauntlet hand up and 
> kissed it. She pressed the hand gently against Leon's cheek.

Eiji: And activated the Fist of Death. Ouch.

> "Have a good night, 
> Inspector." Michelle purred. She turned and left, leaving slightly a stunned AD 
> policeman. 

All: Leon's got a girlfriend, Leon's got a girlfriend...

> Michelle made herself comfortable as she waited for the inevitable. 
> "Just what were you thinking tonight!?" Sylia was as close to angry as Michelle 
> had seen her since they met. 

Sean: [Michelle] Unh... Smash boomer?

> "My suit wasn't responding right so I had my systems make the modification 
> necessary to feel right.

Katherine: So she hadn't even tested her suit under mock combat conditions first?

> I know I shouldn't have done that without your permission and I am sorry for that." 
> "I didn't mean that. I meant what you did with Inspector McNichol.

Eiji: [Sylia] It's disgusting! That sort of thing shouldn't be allowed in public!

> Showing who you were and your actions toward him." 
> "My features were as Monica at the time, so he couldn't recognized my face. And 
> it was harmless." 

Terry: Except for the possibility that he could trace Monica back to you...
Sean: Come on, this is Leon we're talking about. He couldn't trace his lunch back
to the station canteen.

> "You call flirting with him harmless!" Priss was mildly ticked at Michelle. 
> "Do I have to remind you that I am a grown woman who happens to be twice your 
> age Priss.

Katherine: So act it, you idiot. Even Terry's more mature than you.
Sean: Don't you think that's pushing it?
Katherine: All right, maybe not Terry.

> I see nothing wrong with what I did and neither should you." Michelle 
> gave a sly grin.

Terry: Is that including or not giving away your secret identity and endangering
the whole group?
Sean: [Michelle] Um... Whoops.

> "Unless you have a few feelings about our dear Inspector." 
> "No I don't! No way." Priss shouted at the amused cyborg. 

Eiji: Priss is in denial.

> "So you do." 
> "I don't!" 
> "That's enough children.

Terry [Priss] & Katherine [Michelle]: She started it!
Sean: [Nene] They're so immature.

> Michelle, even though it was harmless,

Katherine: Shall we mention now that Genom is hunting for Monica, the ADP know
one of the Knight Sabers is Monica, and the ADP are in Genom's pocket?

> you shouldn't 
> have done something like that while we were working." Sylia seemed adament to 
> Michelle. 

Eiji: [Sylia] If you want to expose yourself to Leon, do it in your off-hours.

> "I understand and will comply boss. I will save flirting and rampent sexual 
> actions with Leon until off-duty hours."

Terry: Lady, you have got no taste.

> She said that in a voice and a slight smile like Rei's (Evanglion).

Sean: The king of all cop-out descriptions.

> Jaws dropped and she smiled. "Don't worry Priss, 
> we could always make it a threesome if you really want to."

Eiji: [Michelle] Although I'd rather leave Leon out.

> She walked out of 
> there and got out of the building before Priss went totally ballistic.

Sean: [Priss] PRISS SMASH! PRISS SMASH PUNY AVATAR!

> The next night at Sylia's 

Eiji: Bow-chika-wow-wow.

> "So what is it like?" A curious voice came from in front of Michelle.

Eiji: [Michelle] Well Priss is kind of soft, but Linna's much more firm and-
[Katherine hits him repeatedly with a cushion, until it explodes in a cloud
of dust and feathers]
Terry: Wonderful. We just cleaned the place up, you know.
Katherine: Sorry.

> Michelle 
> glanced up from her newspaper and saw Nene, who was finishing off a piece of 
> cake. Michelle placed the English language newspaper that she had asked (aka 
> begged) Sylia to get for her. She was sort of disappointed to have to talk 

Eiji: [Michelle] Must I communicate with lower beings?

> because she had been reading an interesting article on a crashed space shuttle, 
> the Orca IV that seemed to have some curious holes in it for some reason. 

Sean: Pay attention, people! This is the plot!
Terry: Say where did the Griffon cybermonster get to anyway?
Katherine: You know, just around.

> "What is what like?" 
> "Having whatever you have, the nanites, and being a cyborg?" 

Sean: It's kind of like hearing odours, seeing sounds and tasting colours while
having a headache in your big toe.

> Michelle thought about it for a moment. "It just feels like a part of me, but a 
> tiny bit different. It's strange to have all the physical changes and to have a 
> real voice in my head, but I got use to it.

Terry: So you basically didn't answer the question at all.

> May I ask you something, Nene?" 
> "Yes?" 
> "It's about Priss.

Eiji: [Michelle] Does she prefer girls?
Sean: [Nene] I think that's meant to be Linna's line.

> I know you all don't trust me a lot, but you aren't hostile 
> toward me like she is. Sometimes she's sort of friendly to me like she is toward 
> you, but she seems to hate me for some reason." 

Katherine: Is that apart from being obnoxious, bossy, overbearing, irresponsible
and pushy?
Eiji: [Priss] Those are all my best traits.

> "Priss has a strong dislike toward boomers and boomeroids." 
> "So what does that. . ." 
> "And cyborgs." 

Terry: Cyborg, boomeroid, same thing, really.

> "Ah. Thank you Nene, this clears up a lot of things for me." 
> "Good evening ladies." Sylia walked into the room as imaculate as usual. 
> Michelle always marveled how Sylia did that. 

Terry: You may not be aware of this, but Sylia has a team of beauticians lurking
around every corner.

> "So boss, may I be a full part of the team now." Michelle asked eagerly. 
> Sylia sighed slightly, "Yes even thought your behavior during missions has to be 
> improved somewhat." 

Katherine: [Sylia] And if you don't stop winging, next time I'll just turn the
battle wagon around and dump you back at home.

> "I am sorry about that and I plan on apologizing to Priss. If I can get past the 
> way she thinks of me. Sometimes from the way she acts around me, it seems like 
> she thinks I'm going to go crazy or something." 

Sean: Well boomer syndrome was medically proven five years ago.

> "Priss probably does. But from the indications of your psychological testing, 
> you are quite stable." 

Terry: [Sylia] Except for that whole "I'm a fairy" incident, but we'll forget
about that.

> "That's nice to know that I'm not looney. So why is Nene here?" 

Eiji: She just doesn't have a life of her own.

> "It about those modifications you made in your hardsuit interface systems." 
> "Oh." 
> At Hot Legs - several days later 

Sean: Can we please not cut out in the middle of scenes?

> Michelle sat glumly as she waited for Priss to come out of her dressing room. 

Eiji: [Michelle] She wouldn't let me in to watch.

> This apology was going to be a difficult one. And she had to make a promise not 
> to antoganize Priss too much. 

Katherine: [Michelle] Uh Priss, I'm kinda sorry that I'm a cyborg and all.

> Priss came over to the table quickly. Linna and Nene gave cheerful greetings. 
> Michelle waited until they were seated. "Priss I'd like to say, about the 
> teasing a few days ago and all, that I'm . . ." 
> Priss turned and waved over someone she saw at the door.

Sean: [Michelle] Fine. Ignore me. See if I care.

> A tall woman with dark 
> brown hair and light brown eyes started walking in their direction. She wore a 
> blue and white biking suit. While she walked in their direction, Michelle 
> noticed that men around her jerked and turned in her direction as though they 
> touched an electric wire. 
> //Buma, model 33s// 

Terry: And just how do the nanites know that just by looking at her?
Katherine: [Nanites] Looking? We're related to her.

> ::A sexaroid. On earth? Are you certain?:: 
> //yes yes.// 

Sean: Is it just me, or do the nanites seem overly excited?
Terry: Guess that means they're male nanites.
Eiji: That would explain an awful lot.

> ::This is most interesting.:: Michelle smiled slightly. 

Eiji: [Michelle] I've always wanted to "meet" one of those.
Katherine: Are we out of cushions?
Terry: 'Fraid so.

> Priss introduced her biking friend as 'Sylvie'. Michelle introduced herself as 
> 'Ash'.

Sean [Ash from Army of Darkness]: Geroooovy!

> Her suspicions were already confirmed by Priss' actions.

Eiji: But they're just good friends. No, really.

> She didn't know 
> Sylvie was a sexaroid and Michelle wasn't planning on telling her. It wasn't her 
> secret to tell. 

Terry: Rather than possibly saving her feelings of pain and betrayal later. She
doesn't need to know that her newfound friend is lying to her.

> Sylvie did not like the look that Priss' friend was giving her.

Katherine: The way she arched her back and hissed was quite off-putting.

> She saw a faint trace of shocked recognition

Terry: [Michelle] Wait, didn't I just see you walking in the door?

> on the other woman's face before her face became 
> more friendly. After a few minutes of talking, she found herself almost liking 
> the other woman. It was just the faint calcuating look on her face that made 
> Sylvie a bit nervous. 
> "So do either of you know where I can get a decent motocycle.

Eiji: [Michelle] I really want a good ride, and I know you two are the right ones
to ask.
Katherine: You are so lucky that we're out of cushions.
Eiji: Yeah, ain't it great?

> I'm getting just a 
> little tired of having to bum rides everywhere I go." Asked asked with a bit of 
> humor.

Terry: Can you please go five minutes without making an idiot of yourself?

> "And I'm tired of not being able to keep up with you Priss." 

Katherine: [Michelle] And so I can intrude on all your private scenes.

> "Like you would be able to even if we found you a motocycle." Priss smirked. 
> Michelle could tell that Priss enjoyed needling her almost as much as Michelle 
> did toward Priss. 

Sean: It's a beautiful hate/hate relationship.

> "You're right Priss. I'm not insane." Michelle smirked back.

Terry: That's exactly what the voices in her head told her.
Katherine: But she *has* got voices in her head.
Terry: Oh yeah.

> After a few moment 
> of wondering about that, Priss sputtered indignantly. "Anyways, I wanted to 
> apologize about the teasing a few nights ago." 
> "Teasing?" Sylvie asked curiously. Linna started giggling. 

Eiji: You know, just teasing. Playing together. Fooling around.

> "Never mind about that." Priss said abruptly, "I'm going to forgive you for 
> now." There seemed to be a promise of dire retribution in her eyes. Michelle 
> suddenly felt she should be becoming very, very scared. 

Sean: This isn't going to turn into one of Priss' self-destructive revenge trips,
is it?

> The next day - 
> "You did what?!" Michelle was just a bit angry. Priss gave a wide smile. 

Eiji: And by this time tomorrow, everyone in megatokyo will have a copy of the
Michelle suit-up sequence.

> "Since you were so interested in Leon, I figured you would like to go out with 
> him tonight.

Terry: That's just inhumane.

> So I set up the time, place, and everything else for you and Leon. 
> Enjoy." Priss left a Michelle standing in the middle of the room, mouth open in 
> shock. 

Sean: Ouch. Score one to Priss.

> Revenge was sweet. 
> That night - 
> "Hi Leon." Michelle stood there, as casually dressed as Leon. 
> "Ready to go." 
> "I was born ready." Michelle got on back of Leon's motocycle and they were off 
> to their evening. 

Katherine: [Deep] They were never seen again.

> At the AD police station the next day, Nene watched as Leon walked (one step 
> above stumbling)

Eiji: [Leon] Brains... Must have brains...

> into the station and made a beeline toward the coffee.

Eiji: [Leon] Coffee... Must have coffee...

> Three cups later, he was slumped in the chair, barely awake. 

Terry: That does it, Leon. No more all-night Chu Chu Rocket marathons for you.
Katherine: No way. You're the only person who would play that game.

> "Leon!" Nene watched as Leon jerked up, almost spilling his coffee. "Is 
> something wrong?" 

Sean: [Leon] I'm a male character in a Bubblegum Crisis story.
Eiji: Poor Leon.

> "It was just a long night Nene, that's all." 

Terry: And you think he looks bad, just wait until you see what Daley looks like
when he turns up.

> Nene just stood there for a minute, staring at the near comatose Inspector

Katherine: [Nene] Yep, Leon's fine.

> and just walked away when she heard his soft snores. 
> Michelle sat there and downed a fourth cup of black coffee with a grimace. The 
> nanites certainly didn't help with getting her awake, or with her hangover. 

Sean: Hey, the nanites can have hangovers too, you know.

> ::Sadistic little buggers have probably developed a corrupt sense of humor.:: 
> She had the sensation of a mental chuckle in the back of her mind. 

Katherine: Those nanites, they're such kidders.

> "Hey cyber." 
> ::Priss. Can't she just back off on me being the way I am.:: "Yes Priss." 

Eiji: [Priss] Was it good for you too?

> "How was your night with Leon?" Priss asked cheerfully and loud. Michelle winced 
> in pain. 

Sean: That good, huh?

> "It went well Priss." 
> Nene walked into the room. "Hey, what did you two do last night. Leon was barely 
> awake when he came in this morning." 

Sean: Nene, you're not old enough to know.

> "It started out well. We did everything that Priss suggested first

Katherine: [Michelle] we were rude, antisocial and threw things at passers-by.
Terry: [Michelle] I never knew a holding cell could be so romantic.

> and then went back to his apartment for a drink." 
> "Then. . ." 

Eiji: Kids, now would be a good time to take your parents out of the room.

> "We had the drink, then another. Oh my goddess." Michelle winced at the 
> memories. 
> "What happened?" 

Terry: [Michelle] The mice... The little mice in their rocket ships!

> "The man has some incredible stanima."

Sean: Hey, don't you know that leon can throw cars around? It's true!

> Eyes widened around the room as Michelle 
> continued. "He just kept going strong all night long.

Terry: [Michelle] Cat attack... Blip! Cat attack... Blip!
Katherine: You're obsessed with that game.

> I lost my count at five. 
> It was like he was some sort of god last night.

Eiji: Leon a god?
Sean: Don't you know, Leon is the Greek god of the outhouse. Look it up!

> The scary thing was how he kept me going during all that time.

Katherine: There's nothing a can of jolt won't cure.
Sean: Except sleep deprivation.
Katherine: Or unclog, for that matter.

> We barely took any breaks between each time even 
> to cool off a bit. And you won't believe me when I say that each time was more 
> intense then the last.

Sean: That's just the cafine speaking.

> I felt like screaming in pain and pleasure by the second hour. 

Katherine: Right now, I feal like just screaming for the sake of it.

> "I think I finally got some sleep at around dawn." 

Eiji: And... rest.

> Michelle looked around at the wide faces. "That was one of the best experiences 
> I've ever had in my life.

Terry: With Leon? You definitely don't get out enough.

> I never knew clubhopping was so much fun." Massive facefaults. 

Terry: That was... Just lame.

> "What did you think I was talking about?"

Sean: Table tennis!

> Michelle asked innocently as she continued to page through the notes. 

Sean: Interocitor... Interocitor incorporating an electron sorter... Interocitor with
voltameter.

> Nene hoped to changed the subject. They had been suckered big time, "What are 
> you looking at?" 

Katherine: Let's see... Boring, boring, boring... Hey look. The script has finally
arrived.

> "Oh, just a bit of something I found interesting.

Terry: Can't be from this fic, then.

> It's on the 33s buma. Since 
> my. . .enhancements have some of the characteristics, I decided to find out more 
> about myself. The stuff is actually quite interesting." 

Eiji: Ifyouknowhatimean.

> "I think I'll pass." Priss proceeded to ignore Michelle which she did except to 
> snipe. Michelle returned the favor.

Terry: Since they don't have any dialogue, you're meant to just assume they ticked
each other off.
Eiji: Can we assume they set a date?
Katherine: Can we assume I hit you?
 
> Michelle checked over the notes, then remembered the morning paper she looked at 
> yesterday.

Terry: I think the plot's trying to creep in any way it can.

> ::The vampire murders are being done by a sexaroid for blood nutrients.

Eiji: Or just some sicko with a really weird fetish. You get that.

> for Sylvie and at least one more, I think. The amount of blood taken 
> would indicate that.:: 

Katherine: Care to leap to any more conclusions while you're at it?

> "Ladies," A cool voice came from behind the group. 
> Michelle placed her paper down as Sylia came into the room. "Evening boss." The 
> meeting started once all of the group sat down.

Sean: Then they read out the minutes from the last meeting, two people needed to
use the bathroom and they got into an argument about everyone's coffee orders.
Terry: Meetings are the greatest impedement to humanity's progress.

> Michelle listened as Sylia 
> described the combat mech known as the D.D. Airborne Battlemover,

Eiji: Heh. Knight Sabers talking about double D's.
Katherine: I oughta hurt you for that.

> that was stolen from the Orca IV.

Sean: You know, if they'd fitted it with a battlemover Club, none of this would
ever have happened.

> Michelle mentally drooled as the amount for the 
> recovery of said Battlemover was mentioned. 
> "Michelle, would you stay for a few minutes."

Eiji: [Sylia] We've got some *personal* business to attend to.

> A few minutes after the meeting, 
> Sylia continued. "I have just a few questions on your designs." 

Katherine: [Sylia] It's about the reactive armour.
Sean: [Michelle] What's wrong with reactive armour?
Katherine: [Sylia] On the inside?

> "That would make sense. I can't remember how I made them myself and I have no 
> plans on them." 
> "Why is that?" 

Terry: [Michelle] I was drunk.

> "I blacked out on some of the more inventive designs I made. One minute I'm 
> looking at the beginning product, the next I'm looking at the finished.

Sean: Hey Sylia, just keep the nanites and fire Michelle. She's nothing without
them.

> Frankly, it scares the shit out of me because I don't know what happens." 
> "Is this something to do with your AI." 

Terry: [Michelle] I'm not a robot.
Sean: [Sylia] I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to your nanites.

> "I think so. I'm thinking it's just how they operate." 

Katherine: If I were her, I'd be getting pretty worried about those nanites by now.

> "Another things are the redesigns I found on my mainframe." 
> "Which ones." 

Eiji: [Sylia] The metal bikini model hardsuits.
Sean: [Michelle] Those were tha nanites' fault too! No, really!

> "The ones for the K-12, K-17, and the Wasp heliocopters." 

Katherine: Improved ADP equipment? Isn't that a tautology?
Terry: Hey, it's better. It only blows up in a ball of flame most of the time.

> "It seemed a challange to me to make something like that and have some very 
> serious limits.

Katherine: You hear that? Normal designers aren't good enough for the amazing Michelle.
Sean: [Sylia] So how much would you know about them without your nanites?
Terry: [Michelle] Umm... They blow up a lot?

> I didn't make any serious changes and I'm thinking of having 
> Nene slip them into their techs department. They could use the help." 

Sean: The ADP needs serious help.
Katherine: Right, so some mysterious, updated and improved blueprints for their own
mecha appear in their own database, and the won't be at all suspicious? As if.

> "Why are you doing this?" 

Terry: [Michelle] Because I need to show the world all the kewl things I can do!
Sean: [Sylia] You mean, your nanites can do.
Terry: [Michelle] Yeah, just rub it in some more.

> "I haven't had much business since I've joined up with you and with your 
> employment I really don't need to much.

Katherine: Of course, *anonymously* dropping the designs in their computer won't
do much for your income.

> Besides, the designs and research are 
> something I wanted to do for a while now." 
> "So, what are you doing with my father's buma research?" 

Eiji: [Michelle] Nothing! Nothing at all! And I'm not looking for Galatea either!
Terry: Wrong BGC, you twerp.

> Michelle's opinion of Sylia raised another notch above its already high heights. 

Terry: [Michelle] Drat! How could she have spotted my blatantly obvious work?

> "You knew I was working on that stuff." 

Sean: The way you left all those diagrams lying around on the floor was a bit
of a giveaway.

> Sylia smiled and Michelle sighed. "I'll show you what I've been working on 
> lately.

Terry: Boomer cola!

> It's something I didn't want you to or the others see until I was 
> certain it was ready.

Katherine: [Sylia] I now trust you more than the people I've been working
with for years. I know it's stupid but hey, it's your fic.

> Which was why I blocked all your cameras in the machine shop."

Eiji: Priss and Linna were rather thankful for that.

> Michelle followed Sylia to the machine shop, where Michelle called out 
> softly. "Hey Lita, you can come on out now." 

Terry: Why is she hiding a Sailor Scout down here?
Katherine: No, it's Lyta Alexander. Michelle's a sub-contractor to the Vorlons.

> A soft 'bleek'

Sean: "Bleek?" What goes "bleek?"

> echoed through the shop and a furry shape leapt out of its hiding 
> place toward the pair of women. It jumped high into Michelle's arms. Michelle 
> staggered slightly at the weight of the creature. 

Terry: [Michelle] What have you been eating?
Sean: BLEEK!
Terry: [Michelle] So that's where Priss' motorslave got to.

> "What is that?!" Sylia asked sharply. 
> "This is Lita, a small buma based on your fathers designs

Katherine: Not that he ever designed any small, furry bogflops.
Sean: Bogflops? [Katherine shrugs]

> and I hope his original intent.

Eiji: So this cute furry critter is going to aid humanity in the development of
space?
Sean: Bleek?

> An AI boomer that is to help, rather than hurt people.

Terry: On the downside, it sheds.

> I used a 
> creatures body based on an old series I read sometimes, the treecat."

Katherine: So in the future, people have nothing better to do than read thirty
year-old fanfics?
Terry: Say, um... When was this fic written?
Voice: [Whistles innocently]
Sean: Bleek.

> Sylia studied the six-legged treecat with interest.

Sean: [Sylia] That thing would go well in a red wine sauce and a side of mushrooms.

> The cat had a mottled brown color 
> and greenish eyes. Except for the six legs, the front two having opposable 
> thumbs, and a intelligent look on the face, it looked a lot like a cat. 

Terry: [Sylia] Okay, so your nanites built a mutant cat. Can I ask where they got
the material from?
Eiji: [Michelle] I/O Japan were having a car boot sale.

> "What can it do." 

Katherine: [Michelle] Just sit around and act cute, really.

> "She can access most computers simply by being in near proximity to them.

Eiji: What, she haxors into them with her B.O?
Sean: 8133|<

> She 
> has to do so because that is the only way she can communicate to us in our 
> language.

Katherine: Of course, it would have been much more efficient to give it the
capacity to speak.

> She has a bio-converter power system backed up by a minature buma 
> power system.

Terry: Plus a Genom thermonuclear supercharger pile, active suspension through
boomer muscle utilization, black box link to the orbital particle beam satellites
and is available in a wide variety of colours!

> Her body has light armor surrounding the internal parts and the 
> tail is a lot stronger than it looks.

Sean: And she has no less than six cup-holders!

> The only offensive weapons are her teeth and claws. The monomolecular claws

Sean: Are you sure they're not just near-monomolecular?
Eiji: Mono-claws? what ever happened to her peaceful intentions?
Terry: No, that's so it can learn fury swipes at level fifteen.

> are one centimeter long

Katherine: You know that's less than a normal cat?
Sean: But they're monomolecular! She can shred furniture faster than any other cat!

> with 'normal' sharp 
> claw sheaths, all of which are retractable. She has been on for a week and seems 
> a lot like a sexaroid mentally as she develops." 

Eiji: [Sylia] Which explains the disturbing way she's rubbing against my leg.
Katherine: For some reason, that just screams "Oscar" at me.

> "Why did you build her?" 
> "For a couple of reasons.

Sean [Michelle]: One, I hadn't proved how much better I am than all of you for
several paragraphs now. Two, the marketing department wanted a cute mascot. Three,
to pad out this ludicrously overlong story some more.

> One is so I can have some more backup in some instances.

Eiji: That's right, a pacifistic mutant cat is going to be an awful help in combat
situations.
Terry: What if your enemies have allergies?

> A second is she is the first step to prove to everyone that boomers 
> can be good without the chance of going bonkers.

Katherine: [Sylia] And what if she goes bonkers?
Terry: [Michelle] Well, she won't.
Katherine: [Sylia] And why not?
Terry: [Michelle] Because the nanites said so! Their microscopic grill structure!
Sean: bLeEk!
Terry: [Michelle] Start running.

> For this reason alone, I 
> believe she is worth more in the long run than anything else I do in the Knight 
> Sabers." 

Sean: [Sylia] Like saving lives?

> "While your actions are somewhat admirable, not telling me first was definately 
> not. You shouldn't do these sort of things behind my back." 

Katherine: [Sylia] Next time you play god, I want in.

> Michelle's body language went cold for a split second, "Et tu Brute. You're the 
> one who is studying one of my nanite samples in order to create a weapon

Terry: Sylia wants her own megaweapon.

> to use against me if I end up exibiting signs of cyberpsychosis."

Eiji: That just proves it, that's a solidly Cyberpunk 2020 term.
Terry: Just admit it Michelle, you're a Cybergeneration rip-off!
Katherine: [Michelle] Never! I'm an original, really! Okay, so everyone else
worked their way into the Knight Sabers by bizarrely improbable methods, bossed
people around and made a super-hardsuit, but only I have a fluffy thing that goes
"bleek!"

> Sylia's blank 
> expression flickered slightly with surprise. "I think we are sort of even in the 
> lack of trust issues." 

Katherine: Whoah whoah whoah, Sylia's taking a precaution in case you go mad and
start killing people. All you're doing is building a cute, fluffy mascot.

> "If you try tell me about the important things you are doing and I try do the 
> same, will that be sufficient?" Sylia asked calmly. 

Terry: [Sylia] This is my place, I make the rules. You bare your soul, I feed you
a smokescreen. Deal?

> Michelle thought about this for a second and smiled, "I believe it would work 
> for me boss." Lita gave a loud purr of contentment. 

Sean: [Sylia] And get rid of the cat.

> From outside the door one could hear Michelle say in a cheerful and irritated 
> voice, "You bloody cat, you stole the rest of the celery. I can't believe you, 
> where did you get your morals from."

Katherine: You? The one who barges into everyone's lives, sorts through everyone's
information and tells everyone what's wrong with them?

> That was followed by a cheerful 'bleek' and the sounds of persuit. 
> If one listened real hard, the person who did might have sworn that they heard 
> Sylia giggle slightly. 

All: Comedy!

> A few days later - 

Sean: Stuff was happening.

> Sylia walked into the hardsuit room to a particular sight.

Eiji: Michelle, Priss, Linna and Nene, all on the floor in a tangled mess. She's
used to it by now.
Sean: Bow chika wow bleek!

> Michelle was simply sitting at a table, staring at a railgun spike intently.

Terry: For some people, life is exciting enough.
Katherine: It appears to be a railgun spike. it has more nutritional value in it
than a McDonalds' French fry.

> She was partially 
> surrounded by the schematics that Sylia gave her for the D.D. Sylia walked up to 
> the other woman and watched the spike also. A glistening grey seemed to flow 
> over the spike for a few minutes before disappearing.

Sean: Okay, so now you're going to mess with everyone else's stuff! Cool!

> Michelle placed it with the other spikes and turned toward Sylia. 
> "Hi boss. What's wrong?" 
> "Nothing at all." Sylia looked around curiously. "Where's your cat."

Katherine: Busy marking her territory.

> Before 
> Michelle could answer, Lita ran into the room and jumped up on a perch, all 
> while holding a large celery stick. She proceeded to chew on it messily

Terry: Fun fact: celery is the world's noisiest food.

> and ignored Michelle as Michelle pointed at her. 
> Michelle glared at the blueprints. "These pieces of crap shematics don't tell 
> enough about it to really on.

Sean: Well, according to this diagram, it's actually a Wiley's Jeep...

> This bloody mech is armed to the teeth with god knows what

Terry: It has a cream pie cannon, tickle lance, anvil missiles *and* a bowling
ball gun.
Sean: What about the jelly bean cannon and the disco strobe light?
Terry: They're on the GTI model.
Katherine: And that is officially obscure.

> and they want us to get it back without knowing what it can do and 
> can't do. Are they nuts because frankly I think they are." 

Sean: Your punctuation is what's nuts, lady.
Eiji: Just because they designed a potent combat machine to exacting standards
and didn't want their secrets getting out means they must be nuts. Just ask
Michelle, she knows everything.

> "It's what we've got to work with." 
> Michelle snarled slightly, "I know for a fact that my celery chewing cataroid 
> over there has fifty times more common sense than whatever idiot or idiots who 
> designed this monstrosity. And she only a few weeks old." 

Sean: It can recalculate relativity! It can split the atom! It can replace
Spock's brain, save the Horta and cure a rainy day! What can't the cat do?
Terry: Clean up after itself?

> "Is that why you are working on your railgun spikes." 

Katherine: Her railguns? You mean she's got the Fist of Death gauntlets, zap-zap
guns, near-monomolecular blades *and* railguns? What next, a miniature particle
beam cannon?

> "I'm really hoping that we can get the DD while it is inactive,

Terry: Well, if you catch it in its lair, there is a 20% chance the DD will be
asleep.

> but if it is 
> powered, I've been modifying these so they can be a bit more effective against 
> it. Sylia, there's one more thing. It's a minor thing but you should know." 

Eiji: [Michelle] Your fly's undone.

> "Yes?" 
> "I think there might be something different about Priss' friend Sylvie. I 
> wouldn't have said anything because it would betray a friend. But I think this 
> could eventually create a problem with the team. I have a feeling she might be 
> connected to those 'vampire' murders somehow. I can't tell anything else besides 
> that in definate." 

Eiji: Apart from the fact that Sylia had already come to that conclusion by now?

> "I will checkup on that." Sylia left Michelle to her own devices. 
> "Thank you Sylia." Michelle mulled over what she had done. She hadn't lied to 
> Sylia, not exactly. But she wouldn't feel right about telling everything about 
> Sylvie, who she could consider a friend. "This job doesn't get any easier, does 
> it." She muttered to herself. 

Terry: Of course, when the going gets tough, the tough use nanites!

> Michelle almost gasped in shock as all of the clues finally set almost 
> perfectly; the DD, Sylvie, and Orca IV. ::I can't believe I missed it before. 

Katherine: [Michelle] Clark Kent - Superman - They're never in the same place at
the same time!

> The 33s buma is illegal on earth but not on Genaros station.

Sean: Actually, they're illegal there too, but who cares?

> The Orca IV came from Genaros, stolen by whoever piloted it. Sylvie, a 33s, showed
> up in a  relatively short time after the Orca crashed near MegaTokyo.:: 

Katherine: [Michelle] Therefore, in conclusion, the pilot of the DD is-
Sean: Bleek?

> ::Wait. The DD Battlemover was on Orca when it was stolen and is currently being 
> used.

Terry: The front of a car was crushed, so I know who the culprit is!

> A 33s, Sylvie or another, has the abilities neccessary to run something 
> like that easily. How could I have missed all of that?::

Katherine: Because you were too busy building a cute, furry bogflop.
Sean: Bogflop?

> Michelle made a few adjustments in her equipment.

Eiji: [Michelle] Turn the control wheel eighteen degrees to the left...

> :Even if it is all coincidence, I can't take that sort of chance.:: 
> Priss noticed her motions. "The bionic woman is a bit nervous, isn't she." 
> Michelle knew she shouldn't have left her old movies out.

Sean: Old movie nothing. Why does everyone in this fic fixate on Twentieth
Century crap?
Eiji: Why do we?
Terry: Ah, but that's because our parents are loonies.

> "Maybe you can't handle playing in the big leagues." 

Katherine: Sylia should just send her down to the Ohio State Championship for
some extra training.

> Michelle had had enough of Priss' remarks and attitude. She stood up and moved 
> toward the hardsuited woman.

Sean: Whoah, when was Priss in her hardsuit? Some description would be nice.
Terry: Don't you know, Priss' hardsuit is lounge wear.

> "Now look, I know you don't like me because I am a 
> cyborg, but you will stop this sort of thing right now. I am damn tired of being 
> reminded that I am some sort of freak.

Eiji: That's right. You're not just any kind of freak, you're an Alchemist!
Terry: I wouldn't call someone a freak and talk about Cybergeneration in the one breath.

> I would like to think I had some chance at normalcy.

Terry: [Michelle] Which is why I constantly flaunt my amazing abilities! Wait a sec...

> Do you understand me?!" 
> Priss decided to back away. Michelle smiled, "I guess so." She backed away too, 
> giving Priss room. 

Sean: A few hundred kilometers shoudl do it.

> Sylia frowned slightly at the altercation from the driver's seat.

All: What?
Katherine: Are they in the truck or something? When did that happen?

> There used to 
> be a bit of playfulness in Priss' and Michelle's teasing but that was vicious on 
> both sides.

Terry: What, so "bionic woman" is suddenly biting and venomous?

> And it had sounded as though whatever is happening has reached a 
> critical point of some sort. 

Sean: Yeah, the tail end of episode five.
Eiji: Does that mean the fic will be over soon?

> "We're almost there." 
> Leon attempted to move again and tried to ignore the pain that his injured ribs 
> gave him and the feeling of the metal band around his neck.

Eiji: Oh look, Leon got the crap beat out of him. What a surprise.

> He had tried to stop 
> the DD. Battlemover in a K-12 and had managed to keep it back until it went into 
> some kind of hypermode.

Sean: Sylvie used the hero booster!

> He knew that meant the J-1 had taken over and it was 
> minutes from blowing up most of Mega-Tokyo with a .5 megaton neutron bomb. But 
> he had the feeling that he wouldn't live to see it.

Terry: Wouldn't that be a shame if you didn't live to see your own death?
Katherine & Eiji: Huh?
Sean: Bleek?

> The battlemover aimed its 
> machine cannon at him. Suddenly the restraint around his neck exploded.

Eiji: Of course, it was still around his neck when it went up... Messy.

> He saw several different colored hardsuits appear on the scene on the horizon. 

Katherine: Several hardsuits? How many members do they have, anyway?

> ::The Knight Sabers.:: He felt the K-12 and himself being dragged back from the 
> growing battle.

Sean: Don't worry Leon, it's not like you would have contributed anyway.

> A soft voice said, "Please don't move, Inspector." 
> "The D.D., it has a 1/2 megaton neutron bomb in it." 

Katherine: Oh, we're going for that "You're winning, so I drop the big one"
silliness, are we?

> Monica said softly, "That's what the boss said. I've got to go help stop that 
> thing now." 

Eiji: So why are you standing around chatting?

> Leon watched as the Knight Saber went into the fight. "Good Luck." 
> Michelle smiled a bit. Leon barely heard from the Saber, "I think I'll need it." 
 
Katherine: You don't need luck, you've got the unholy power of nanites!
Terry: I'm sorry, but the nanites are on a break at the moment. You're on your own.
Sean: [Michelle] I'm screwed.

> Michelle watched impassively from her vantage point, studying where everyone and 
> everything was.

Eiji: Priss was in the ballroom with the dagger, Linna and Sylia were doing the
horizontal mambo, and Nene had fallen and twisted her ankle again.

> She was told to stay back as the rest of the team dealt with the 
> battlemover. This was mainly because she didn't have a motoroid yet and would 
> have to rely only on her suit.

Sean: What, like everyone else is doing?

> She managed to get a slight clause placed into 
> her promise; with Sylia's permission she could help if there was need.

Terry: Well there wouldn't be much point in bringing her along otherwise, would there?

> She 
> continued checking around, making sure that no one was wandering in 
> unexpectedly. 

Eiji: That's right, random bystanders out in the middle of a junk heap are just going
to blunder straight into the path of the rampaging homicidal killing machine.
Katherine: It happens all the time in atomic monster movies.

> The team had managed to damage the battlemover before losing the capacity of the 
> motoroids.

Eiji: Not that they were using them in the first place.

> Then she heard what she half expected over the open communication net.

Sean: [Sylia] Run away, run away!

> "Priss, you're going to have to shoot me to stop me." Michelle keyed her 
> com. "Sylia, I'm moving in." Then she cut it off before a reply came back. 

Terry: That's right, commanders are there to be ignored!

> Firing her jets at maximum power, she flew. She armed her railgun launcher. 
> "No I can't!" Priss shouted out as she aimed. She had only one shot at this. Her 
> motoid had been destroyed and the final seconds of the neutron bomb were 
> counting down. If she didn't stop the battlemover, all of MegaTokyo would die. 
> "You have to!" 

Eiji: She could in the original, why not now?
Sean: Use the tree cat! I'm sure it can save you now!

> Michelle watched as Priss raised her railgun launcher even as she herself aimed. 
> Michelle changed her target briefly and fired one grazing shot at Priss

Terry: That's it, you're getting executed this time.
Katherine: I'm sure she had Priss' best interests in mind.
Eiji: She did?
Katherine: Well, probably not.

> and the 
> rest at the battlemover and occupment. Priss fell to the ground, essentually 
> paralyzed by the railgun spike

All: [nodding slowly and disbelievingly] Suuuure. Riiiight.

> and watched the battlemover start in on her. A 
> splurt of blood had flown from Syvie's stomach and she slumped.

Eiji: [Sylvie] Couldn't I be killed by someone I like instead?

> Michelle 
> couldn't manuver due to the speed she was flying at and got hit by near point 
> blank energy fire.

Sean: Huh? Shouldn't it have stopped by now?

> She felt the pain as it scorched and gouge her armor dreadfully. 
> A few seconds later, the battlemover jerked and slowed. 
> A few seconds after that, it stopped moving and nearly fell over. 
> Michelle scanned the thing anxiously as she cautiously moved toward it. 

Terry: [Nene] That's right, I'm barely in the story, so you go and steal the only
scene I've got left! I'm going to my trailer to have a sulk! And some cheesecake.

> All the readings came back that the battlemover was deactivated as well as the 
> neutron bomb. She sighed and turned on the communication net. "Sylia, I think 
> it's dead." 

Katherine: Do you want to take its pulse, just to be sure?
Sean: It's gone back to happy mode.

> Michelle heard from Nene. "She's right, the battlemover and the bomb are 
> disarmed." 
> "You fucking bitch, you goddamn killed her!" Priss screamed at Michelle from her 
> prone position as she saw the limp figure of her friend. 

Terry: I'm guessing Priss is angry.

> "No, I didn't. No more than you are dead." Michelle pulled Sylvie's limp form 
> from the Battlemover. "The nanites are repairing the damage and she will awaken 
> in a few hours.

Katherine: Whoah, whoah, no way! Even if it is a nanite-coated railgun spike,
she'd be just as dead as if she'd been perforated by a normal railgun spike.
Terry: Yes, but you see, the nanites are bringing her back to life.
Katherine: Mutter grumble why don't they just drag around a human cleric with
them and be done with it grumble.

> Your suit will recover in a minute or two.

Terry: Or your money back!

> Michelle knew her voice sounded cool but couldn't help it. 
> "Would you explain." Sylia's precise voice came over the communicaton.

Sean: Well you see, nanites are tiny little robots that make "eee eee eee" noises
and can do anything. No, really.

> Michlle carried Sylvie along as they went back to the semi. 
> "You saw that I was modifying the railgun spikes a few days back." 
> Sylia nodded. 
> "You never asked what I was doing to them.

Sean: Say, why didn't she ask?
Katherine: So why didn't she tell Sylia? You know, that whole "sharing
information" agreement they made.

> I packed them full of computer nanites with two functions.

Eiji: One: Give her a makeover. Two: Give her plot contrivance powers.

> Neutralize a hostile CI and temporarily neutralize a 
> nonhostile CI or an AI." 

Terry: And if you knew what a CI was, that would mean something.

> "Why didn't you tell me this." 

Sean: [Michelle] You didn't ask!

> "I didn't figure out the Sylvie had anything to do with the battlemover until a 
> little before now. I had the neutralization of the DD planned as a last chance 
> precaution, but I had to make some dirty modifications for the bomb and for 
> Sylvie. They had about a 75 percent chance of succeeding only if I had multiple 
> shots into the cockpit. Any other shot, the nanites would have taken too long to 
> work and we'd be dead." 

Katherine: None of which answers the question.
Terry: [Michelle] On the other hand, we'd all have killer suntans.

> Priss was still angry. "You cold, calculating bitch. You never tell half of the 
> stuff you are up to and you treat us all like pawns in some sort of game.

Katherine: I see she's getting her lines form her 2040 version.

> You 
> probably already knew that Sylvie was a boomer and you never told us. Damn you." 

[They all cheer wildly and loudly]

Sean: Go Priss! I never liked you until just now!

> Michelle glanced at Sylia and saw that Sylia knew. "I knew from the first time I 
> saw her.

Eiji: [Michelle] They way our eyes met and that romantic music played.

> I had no right to tell you who she was." Michelle looked blank, "And 
> you are right, I am damned. I have been for a long time." 
> Later at Sylia's, Priss waited anxiously as the final adjustments to Sylvie were 
> made

Eiji: Socket wrench?
Sean: Socket wrench.
Eiji: 3/8ths gripley?
Sean: 3/8ths gripley.
Eiji: Left-handed blinz?
Sean: Bleek.

> to make her self-sufficient. The nanites Michelle had fixed the majority of 
> the damage by the time they got back to HQ. Between Sylia, Mackie, and Doctor 
> Raven, they had managed to make the adjustments needed. 

Terry: They'd lowered her suspension, added a blower, enlarged her brake pads and
given her cool flame decals.
Eiji: Heh. You said blower. [Katherine punches him]

> Sylia came out on her roof. If the cameras in that area hadn't suddenly gone 
> black, she wouldn't have known where Michelle had gone.

Sean: Michelle: The walking static field.

> She found the woman 
> sitting, looking at the stars as she absentmindedly petted Lita. Lita sat there 
> and purred a long soft note of sadness. 

Katherine: And absentmindedly chewed off Michelle's fingers.

> She turned as Sylia came up near her. "Miss Stingray, is there a problem with 
> Sylvie?" 

Terry: [Sylia] No, but all the modifications are voiding her warranty.

> "No, she came through all right and should be able to get up within a day or 
> two. Do you want to talk about it." 

Sean: [Michelle] I already told you about it.
Eiji: [Sylia] I don't mean the cat.

> "You mean the deceptions and what I did to Priss and the rest of you. I had to 
> do it that way. It was just my suspicions and I knew they wouldn't be listened 
> to,

Katherine: No, not at all. If you'd told Priss about the plan and loaded her
railgun with coated spikes, she would have had no qualms about firing and wouldn't
have cut it so close. In short, it all came down to a cheap grab for personal glory.

> so I made the plans alone." She laughed softly. "'Damned if you do, damned 
> if you don't.'" 
> "You are not damned, do you hear me!" Sylia stated almost angrily. 
> "Then what do you call all of what I've done since I've become the manipulative 
> monster in front of you." 

Katherine: I'd tell Sylia to give her both barrels, but Michelle's doing it for her.

> "Being human of course."

Terry: [Sylia] Not that I'd know.
Sean: The nanites take offence at that remark.

> Sylia left Michelle to think about his. "You will be 
> punished for not informing me about some things, but I think you should know I 
> will listen to you more carefully from now on.

Eiji: [Sylia] I'm going to forget about you shooting at Priss.

> Sylia left the rooftop to Michelle. 

Katherine: [Michelle] I claim this rooftop for Spain!

> The next morning found Michelle looking in on Sylvie. The woman laid on the bed 
> with a large bandage on her stomach where the railgun spike had skewered her. 
> Michelle looked rather guilty. 
> "Sylvie, I'm sorry about what happened to you and what I did to you." 

Terry: [Sylvie] Don't worry, I get shot all the time.

> "Why?" 
> "Why what?" 

Sean: Why anything?
Eiji: +++infinite domain error+++redo from start+++
Katherine: How did you pronounce that?
Eiji: Oh, my crazy uncle Tango taiught me how to pronounce control characters.
Voice: Figures.

> "Why if you knew that I was a buma from the first time you saw me, you didn't 
> tell Priss? Or why did you plan to save my life? Why do you care about me since 
> I'm a buma?" 
> "Because, I know what it is like to be different from everyone else.

Sean: Michelle's special.

> And being of homo sapiens doesn't automatically make one human.

All: Yes it does.

> Or being a buma automatically not make you human.

All: Yes it does.

> Don't ever forget that!" 
> Lita jumped up on the bed and Sylvie jerked in surprise.

Terry: [Sylvie] YEEEOOOWCH! NOT ON THE STOMACH!

> After a moment she 
> started petting the treecat buma. "This is Lita, she's. . .well a treecat. A bit 
> like you, I guess." 

Katherine: [Michelle] Except she's small, furry, has six legs and can't talk.
Sean: Bleek!
Terry: [Sylvie] Oh really? That's fascinating.

> Sylvie looked at the young woman in front of her, "I'm wondering, who are you 
> really and how did you get mixed up in this." 

Eiji: Oh no, we're not going to have to read this again, are we?

> Michelle laughed. "That's a long story." She heard an angry shout that sounded 
> like Sylia.

Terry: [Michelle] Oh, great. She's found the cat hair in her underwear drawer.

> "And apparently one for a different time." 
> Sylvie listened carefully to the conversation as she petted Lita, "Michelle, the 
> news said the Battlemover reactivated in the caravan that it was being 
> transported in and escaped by using some sort of cloaking device. Do you know 
> anything about this?" 

Eiji: Yes, it's a ridiculously huge contrivance!
Sean: Since when did it have a cloaking device?
Terry: It doesn't.
Sean: Since when did it function without a pilot?
Terry: It doesn't.

> "Sylia, why would you say something like that.

Katherine: [Sylia] Because you're the kind of smug, self-important git who mucks
around with important devices and makes vital plans without telling anyone?
Terry: [Michelle] Well, besides that.

> Do I look like the sort of person 
> who would steal a large mech for the purpose of keeping it out of the wrong 
> hands it was being returned to.

Katherine: Rather than say, simply taking it from the junk pile where you fought
it or destroying it there and then, or even mentiuoning this to someone else? Or
would that just get in the way of another one of your immature grabs for attention?

> Besides the neutron bomb was already taken out 
> before it disappeared. Not that I know anything about that." Sylia sighed and 
> Sylvie couldn't help giggling. 

Sean: [Sylvie] Do I have to put up with her?
Katherine: [Sylia] I'm afraid so.
Sean: [Sylvie] Maybe I was better off dead.

> ___________________ 
> Until Next time . . . or the next draft 

Terry: Be here... Same nano-time, same nano-channel!

[The TV switches off]

Terry: Is that it?
Voice: That's the end of the chapter.
Katherine: Chapter?
Voice: There's another one, but it's short.
Sean: Fine. So can we go now?
Voice: Actually, first I'd like some reviews of the fic. Just give me your
impressions, and tell me what you thought.
Eiji: In other words, how it sucked?
Voice: Not quite.
Eiji: The characterisations in this fic seriously ticked me off. I mean, Michelle
just spends all her time carrying on like a spoiled five year-old with a god
complex, and everyone just bows down and damn well lets her. They seem to forget
vital things, like how she shot Priss, or her promise to tell Sylia everything. I
mean, it just blows chunks how the authour is so biased to his character to let
her get away with everything.
Terry: for me it was something similar; basically how the story wasn't really about
BGC. You know, if you're going to write a BGC fic, then it should actually be about
the characters of the show, not just putting them as a backdrop to show how way
past cool your new character is. If you want to write all about a new character,
fine; just don't pretend it's a BGC fic, and make up your own setting.
Katherine: The fic started out well-written, but it quickly degenerated into a
mess. The punctuation and grammar were terrible, and there were more than a few
typos. Much of the second half of it looked like the authour hadn't given much
consideration at all to checking or editing the fic. It wasn't an unreadable mess,
but it was noticeable at times.
Sean: What gets me about this is the sheer improbability of it all.
Katherine: That's rich coming from the son of a comic book writer.
Sean: Ha ha. What I mean is that it starts of silly, with Michelle getting her
powers from a bunch of nanites who just *happened* to get exploded in a way that
didn't harm them and just *happened* to find her. Then she becomes inexplicably
good at everything which allows her to basically go around and tell everyone what
to do. And above all that, she builds the little furry bogflop, which was not just
horribly impractical, it was also pretty pointless to the story.
Terry: Bogflop?
Sean: Bogflop?
Katherine: Bogflop. Deal.
Terry: So I guess they could clean this place after all.
Eiji: Clean it nothing! Those nanites could easily rebuild it from rubble in nothing
flat.
Sean: Where do you reckon we can get some?
Katherine: Oh, just walk to the corner store for a six-pack of amazingly amazing
nanites.
Terry: I assume you're joking there.
Katherine: I hope I am. Last time I checked, you couldn't.
Terry: Well let's go see. All of a sudden, I want to be an omnipotent Japanese
schoolgirl!
Sean: You and you alone.

[They head out. The screen goes blank]

Eiji: Does that mean you'd have a short skirt and panty shot action?
Voice: Kids these days...
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Riffed by: Rick R. Mortis (rickr@elmerstudios.com) & Jinas (jinas@elmerstudios.com)

Terry and Eiji Tateo are copyright 1999-2000 Max Fauth (Jinas)
Katherine Bartley & Sean Mortis are copyright 1999-2000 Alex Fauth (Rick R.
Mortis).

Elmer Studios!:
	http://www.elmerstudios.com
	All of Elmer Studios' MSTings, artwork, character profiles, AAA
	conversions and the Satellite of Rednecks in one spot.

Rick's Mecha Madness Page:
	http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Realm/7194/index.htm
	Fighters Anthology .lib and mission files, utterly disturbing Nova
	Satori shrine, the AntiKevs and Fanfic Carp, all in one big steaming
	pile.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
> It was going to be a long couple of weeks. 
> A couple of weeks later -