Elmer Studios presents... ------------------------------------------------------------------------ MSTing no. 42. Another solo for Jinas, this time taking on a Sailor Moon/Pokemon crossover. Sounds good in theory... Sailor Moon is copyright Naoko T./DIC. Pokemon is copyright Nintendo. The Sailor Scouts Meet The Pokemon Gang is copyright Maury M. And no, I'm not making that title up. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The woman stood facing her opponent, left leg forwards in a relaxed stance, left arm at her side. The only sign of her intentions were in the somehow alert sword held tightly by her waist in her right hand. Her opponent's stance was somewhat different; he had his right leg placed forwards, he held his blade directly in front of him. His body was comparatively tense, ready to move at moment's notice. His narrowed eyes showed all that was on his mind - victory. At an unspoken signal, they both burst into action. The woman darted forwards, sweeping out her sword in a wide arc at chest level. The man brought his arms back and angled his blade to deflect her own away, then quickly counterattacked with a sudden forwards stab. She stepped easily to the side and swept her sword back, over her head and downwards towards him in a huge sweeping arc. The same attack was repeated when the man sidestepped the first arc, almost as easily as she had avoided his own blow. This time, he brought his sword up and clashed it against her own, cancelling its momentum and leaving her off-balance. He took the opportunity and stepped forwards, bringing his raised sword down in a brief tapping motion. She recovered in time to dart backwards from the blade aimed at her shoulder. The faced off each other for a second then the woman moved in, once again taking the initiative. She swept her sword ahead of her and to the left, then brought it back to the right when he backed away from her first swing. The second swing also avoided, she brought the blade back and spun around in a full circle, bringing the tip forwards again straight towards his chest. With nowhere left to go, he barely deflected it away, batting the sword aside and leaving the thrust to reach past his shoulder. He used this opportunity to lash out with his right foot in more of an over-reaching step than a kick, catching her in the stomach and staggering her back. Rather than following up he stood back, preparing for her next attack. She however remained still in her stance. "Not bad," she said to him. "And I'm a bit out of practice, too." He replied with a touch of a cocky smile. The smile was returned by the woman who suddenly knew she'd won. She once again lunged forwards, this time spinning her sword in her hand like rotor blade. The man flinched backwards, unsure of how to defend then suddenly found her sword veering straight in at him. He managed to avoid the thrust and follow up, sweeping his sword first down then up again towards her. She backed off readily rather than defend against the attack, resuming her original stance for a split second before lunging forwards and bringing her sword blade diagonally upwards towards his chest. He brought his sword up to bat it away again but she suddenly stopped the thrust, angled her sword sharply downwards and plunged it towards his feet. He clumsily sidestepped the sudden attack, more than a touch surprised. His guard open, she swept upwards in a circular arc, clashing her blade against the man's sword hilt and knocking it clean out of his grasp. She suddenly leapt back from her defenceless opponent, shifting her stance to land right foot forward and with her right pulled back, ready for a massive forwards lunge. As she landed, she brought her left foot back to ready for the final blow- Completely failing to notice the coffee table behind her. She bashed her left ankle hard against it and yelled out in surprise. Her left foot slipped from it's intended position and she was thrown off balance, leaving her to tumble backwards into an embarrassing heap on top of the table. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The scene - a well furnished apartment, with two couches in an L formation in front of a large cabinet that includes a wide-screen TV and video recorder. The apartment has a few doors to who-knows-where, and a small kitchenette. A coffee table sits in front of the two couches, and a desk, home to a well-equipped PC sits off to one side.] [Tsuneo is standing by the barrier between the main room and the kitchenette, his sword lying on the floor beside him. Dan is seated on the sideways couch, looking incredulously at the spectacle before him. Maya is seated on the forwards facing couch, wincing in sympathy. Worst of all, Elana is sprawled on her back on top of the coffee table.] Elana: Owie... Dan: *Really* well done. Tsuneo: You almost had me there, too. Elana: [Stands] What do you mean by "Almost?" I would have won if not for the table. [Tsuneo recovers his sword and sheathes it. Elana does likewise.] Maya: Did you two have fun? Elana: Yeah. It's been a while since I've had a good duel. Tsuneo: Me too. We should try this more often. Elana: [Coldly] Don't get your hopes up. Dan: Piece of advice, wonder boy. This one's even more frigid than Natasha. Maya: Dan, you really shouldn't say things like that. [Elana turns menacingly towards Dan, grabs a cushion and whacks him hard with it.] Elana: I don't know why I agreed to do this in the first place. Dan: 'Cause you needed the money? Tsuneo: Your job was finished? Maya: And you had no other offers coming in? Elana: Something like that. [Elana and Tsuneo sit - Tsuneo next to Dan, Elana nest to Maya. Tsuneo and Maya are closest on the corner.] Maya: So what is it today? Voice: Just a short little piece. A Pokemon/Sailor Moon crossover, actually. Dan: Cool. Elana: Doesn't sound too bad... Tsuneo: But why me? I know zip about both shows. Voice: Well, there was a space to fill and I didn't know if Maya was coming. Dam: And could you imagine Celena in front of a Sailor Moon/Pokemon crossover? [The TV screen lights up.] Tsuneo: Actually, that could be kind of funny. > The Sailor Scouts Meet The Pokemon Gang Elana: Is that the title or a plot summary? Voice: Well... both. > Part 1 > "A Beginning" Elana: The author's keeping up a consistent level of imagination. > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > Before you read this story, I wold like to dedicate it to my best friend > in the entire universe, Aly E. She slipped and fell on the ice in front > of her house, and broke her leg. She has to keep the cast on for six > weeks! Aly, I'm gonna request "Lullabye" at the dance just for you. Tsuneo: Please don't riff the author's musical tastes. We'll get flamed for sure. > Get well soon! > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > The Sailor Scouts were arguing about where they should go. Dan: I hear Tahiti's nice this time of year. > They argued for a while Maya: Not that the author bothered to tell us what they were saying. They just *argued.* > before Lita finally said, "I know ! Let's go for ice cream !" Dan: And then discover you're in an eight year old's dream. > "Sure !!" the other Scouts said in unision. Tsuneo: Ow, my ears... > "Now if we could just find an ice cream parlor..." added Mina. Maya: Wah, wah, waahhh... > *** > Somewhere else in Tokyo, the Pokemon Gang were lost. "Ash, not again!" > complained Misty. "Why do you always have to get us lost?" Elana: [Misty] And why do all these fics have to start like this? > "Sorry", Ash replied. "Where the heck are we anyway?" Brock thought > for a moment and then replied, > "I think we're in Tokyo." Tsuneo: So he just answered his own question? Elana: Brock tends to talk to himself a lot. Maya: [Brock] Yesss. > "Well, wherever we are, I'm really hot. Let's get ice cream.", Misty > said. > "Yeah!!" said Ash and Brock together. Dan: And even I can see where this is going. > *** > After an hour of searching, the Scouts found an ice cream parlor. All: [Burst out laughing] Tsuneo: Okay, we officially have the fic from another planet here. Elana: A whole hour? I thought their lives revolved around an ice cream parlour. Maya: And the video game arcade. Don't forget the video game arcade. > As soon as they got in the door, Serena bumped into, who but, Brock. Elana: Not that Brock minded, of course. > "Sorry", Brock said apoligetically. > "That's okay", Serena replied. Dan: [Serena] But could you *please* move your hands? > "She's just a total klutz", Raye added. Serena gave her a dirty look. Maya: And asked Raye to wash it for her. > It was then that Brock looked at the Scouts. Elana: And looked, and looked, and looked for years. > "Am I awake?" Brock asked himself out loud. "No, the're too beautiful > to be real. Misty, pinch me." Tsuneo: Talk about your bad set-ups. > "Sure, what ever you say!" Misty said cheerfully. But instead, of > pinching him, she whacked him over the head with a mallet. (I hate > that, don't you? It's really stupid, but it's in tons of anime) Elana: [Applauds] Dan: So why the hell did you put it there? > "Great job", Raye complimented Misty. > "Yeah, he deserves it", agreed Lita. Dan: Now since when did Lita treat guys like that? Maya: [Lita] Well, he looks like my old boyfriend Frank, and he deserved a mallet in the face. > *** > "Are we ever gonna get ice cream?" Ash asked impationtly. They were > just about to get in line when Serena screamed, [They all clutch their ears.] Tsuneo: Oww... Now I remember why I don't like this show. > "Oh how CUTE!!!" Of course, she was reffering to Pikachu. Maya: No, actually she was referring to Misty but didn't want anyone to know. Elana: Hey! > "It's a Pikachu, right?" Amy asked. Maya: Given that it's plastered *everywhere* these days, it's a bit hard to get that one wrong. > "Yeah", Ash said. "It's the first Pokemon I ever got." Mina asked, Tsuneo: Not that it was a question. > "Wanna sit together? Maybe we'll become friends." All: Huh? Dan: Do people really talk like that? Tsuneo: Only if they're on drugs. > "Sure", Brock answered. "By the way, none of you would be interested > with going out with me, would you?" > "NO!!!" all the Sailor Scouts screamed together. [The all clutch their ears.] Maya: Someone turn down the volume! > Finally, they all > ordered thier ice cream, except Serena. She was too busy whining, Elana: Just so we know, will this fanfic be all about mistreating Serena? Dan: Looks that way. Elana: Wonderful. Might as well just label it an antific and be done with it. Maya: Now, now, that's not fair. > "WAAAAA!!!" "I forgot my MONEY!!!" She looked at Raye. [The all clutch their ears.] Dan: Oww... Tsuneo: Will someone *please* shut her up? > "I'm not lending you any money, Serena", she said. "The last time I > lent you money, it ended up in a sewer." Elana: I would love to see how that happened. > (No, this does not reffer > to ANYTHING, so don't sit for hours trying to figure out what it > reffers to.) Maya: Oh, come *on.* No-one's that hopeless. Dan: That's a relief. I was trying to figure when that happened. Maya: [Sighs] Forget it. > Everyone looked at her. "Long story", she said. Tsuneo: [Raye] Four score and seven years ago... > *** > Amy gave Serena the money, and they sat down. Tsuneo: And I'd like to know why that deserves a scene change. > Raye looked at Misty's > outfit, which was what she usually wears. (A yellow midriff top with > denim shorts and red suspenders.) Dan: Yes, we know that. It's not like she wears anything else. > "Where'd you get that outfit, a dumpster?" Raye asked. Elana: [Misty] Same place you got your dialogue. > "No", Misty answered. "My mom bought it for me." Raye replied, > " Guess your mom has really bad taste." Dan: Oh, come on. Even Raye's not this bad. > "Shut up!" Misty screamed. > "Wow, this is bad!" Ash reacted. "She always fights with me, Tsuneo: Especially in the one-dimensional characterisation she gets in most fics. > but it's never this bad." > "Yeah, Raye fights with me a lot, but I think it's only been this bad > 20 times", Serena added. Maya: This? This is mild. > *** > "Hey, you guys", Lita said, "I hate to break up our little chat > session, Tsuneo: Meanwhile, in the same scene... > but Luna just called us on our Scout Communicators. Dan: So how come they didn't hear it? Elana: [Raye] Serena dropped hers in her ice cream. Maya: [Serena] RAYEEE! You're so MEEEAN! > The > Negaverse is draning the arcade customers' energy." With that as thier > cue, the Sailor Scouts transformed. Tsuneo: What, right here in the middle of an ice cream parlour where anyone can see you? Dan: Ah, secret identities are overrated anyway. > "Mercury power!" "Mars power!" > "Jupiter power!" " Venus power!" " Moon Prism power!" they screamed, > loud enough for the nice people in Cranston, Rhode Island to hear > them. All: Funny. Elana: Still mistreating the show, I see? > They started for the arcade. "Wait!" Ash called after them. > "We'll help you. With our Pokemon." Dan: Yeah, I can see that. [Ash] Bulbasaur, I choose- Maya: Vampeal! ZAP! Dan: [Ash, weakly] Urgh... Never mind... > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > By, > Maury M. > To be continued in... > Part 2, "The Battle" > Author's Note: > Will the Scouts and the Pokemon Gang team up to defeat the Negaverse? Tsuneo: Would it make any difference if they did? Dan: Will Brock get a date? Elana: Will the characters be portrayed as anything other than one- dimensional stereotypes? Maya: Does anyone care? > To find out, well, read Part 2: The Battle, coming soon. (hopefully) > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > The Sailor Scouts Meet The Pokemon Gang > Part 2 > "The Battle" > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > "It's too dangerous", Sailor Mercury said. > "We wanna help", Ash replied. Tsuneo: [Ash] We can stand around and shout out trademarks. > "I'd do anything for a kiss from you guys", Brock added. Ash and Misty > glared at him. > "Let's go!" Sailor Mars shouted. Maya: Just to get the plot moving. > When they entered the arcade, they saw > a giant octopus from the Negaverse standing in the middle of the floor. Dan: [Pokedex] Octorock. A Negaverse Pokemon. It has a bad temper and drains energy from humans. If you fight it, you're an idiot. > "Ew, gross!!!" Sailor Moon said. Elana: [Lita] Mmm, tasty. Anyone want calamari? > "Hey, who are you?" the giant octopus asked. > "I think you guys should know us by now!" Sailor Moon said. "We're the > Sailor Scouts!" Tsuneo: [Yawns] Wake me when the trite dialogue ends. Elana: That may be a while. > "And we're Ash, Misty, and Brock", said Misty. Maya: Wow. I'm sure it's shaking in its... erm, tentacles. > The octopus replied, > "What a bunch of losers. Oh well, they'll be dead in a few minutes." > With these words, the octopus unleashrd about 2,000 gallons of water Maya: Whoah! Elana: -Flooding the arcade and drowning everyone inside. The end. > at > our two groups of heroes. The Pokemon Gang dodged the attack, but the > Scouts weren't quick enough and were knocked unconious. Dan: Er, no... This is just stretching credibility a bit *too* much. Maya: So a bunch of kid trainers are better at fighting supernatural monsters than a team of superheroes? Makes sense. > Ash, Misty, > and Brock thought fast and decided Ash and Misty should disract the > octopus whilr Brock revived the Scouts. Elana: Why can I foresee another mallet rapidly approaching? Dan: With what he'd do, they're bound to wake up. > "Hey, you big ugly squid!" Misty said. "Take this! Starmie, Staryou, > go!" Misty's two Pokemon didn't do much damage. Maya: Notice the riveting, detailed and intense description. > "My turn!" said Ash. "Pikachu, Thunder-" he was cut off. > "Prepare for trouble." > "Make it double." Elana: Just when I thought it couldn't get any dumber... > "Great, now we have these clowns to deal with, too", Ash said. > "I can't belive you'd be soooooo stupid to team up with that giant > piece of seafood!" Misty added. Dan: [James] Neither can we, but the so-called plot requires it. > "That giant piece of seafood just happens to be helping us catch > that Pikachu of yours" Jesse replied. Just as Team Rocket and the > giant octopus were about to team up, Maya: Weren't they already teamed up? > they heard a voice say, > "Hold it right there!" Of course, it was Sailor Moon. All: Of course. > Jupiter and Venus got ready for thier attacks. > "Jupiter Thunder..." > "Venus Cresent Beam.." > "CRASH!!!" > "SMASH!!! The two attacks did damage to the octopus and sent Team > Rocket running around the room. Maya: You'd think they'd have problems with attacking humans, but nooo... > "That's your cue!" Sailor Mars said. Dan: [Snagglepuss] Exit, stage left! > "Right!" Sailor Moon replied. Moon Tiara.. MAGIC!!!" With that the > octopus turned to moon-dust, and Team Rocket blasted off yet again. > The day was saved. Elana: What an intense, dramatic and moving combat scene that was. Tsuneo: [Snores loudly.] Maya: Should we wake him up? Elana: It's not like he's missing anything worthwhile. > As they were walking out of the arcade, Ash said, > "You guys are really the Sailor Scouts?" All except Tsuneo: Nah! [Tsuneo starts awake.] Elana: Well, let's see... You saw them transform, you fought alongside them... Of course they're the Sailor Scouts! Tsuneo: Huh? What happened? Dan: Nothing. > "Yeah", Serena replied. "Wierd, huh. Dan: No, weird is a magic flo-bee. Elana: No, it's a Sailor Moon/Pokemon crossover. Tsuneo: Actually, it's Lara Croft having a one night stand with Fox Mulder. Maya: Well, actually it's waking up in a bed full of soapy frogs. [They all stare at her] Maya: Well, he deserved it. > "Hey, you guys", Brock said. "I did save your lives. The least you > could do is go out with me." > "NO!!!!!!!!!!" all the Sailor Scouts screamed together. [They all clutch their ears.] Elana: Even she doesn't scream this much! > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > By, > Maury M. > To be continued in... > Part 3, "An Ending" > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > The Sailor Scouts Meet The Pokemon Gang > Part 3 > "An Ending" > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > The Sailor Scouts and the Pokemon Gang were hot. And hungry. And tired. > The girls had just dragged Ash and Brock to just about every store in > Tokyo, and Ash had dragged everyone to a million Pokemon conventions. Elana: [Sighs] Okay, right about now I'd insert a stock rant about how the Pokemon and Sailor Moon worlds are totally incompatible, but I can't be bothered. Dan: Too late. > "Hey, let's get ice cream!!" Mina suggested. Tsuneo: And who saw that coming? > "Yeah!" everyone said together. Yes, they were going to an ice cream > parlor again. Dan: Thanks, random voice, but we kinda guessed that. > (you know, ice cream's pretty big in Japan) Tsuneo: Thank you so much for that. > This time, Serena had her money, though. Maya: Can't have been a good shopping trip then. > They walked in, ordered, and sat down. > Just as Serena was about to take the first lick of her ice cream, she > exclaimed, > "Darien!!!" She ran over to hug him. "Wanna sit with us, Honey?" she > asked. > "Why not?" Darien replied. Dan: I can think of a reason. Tsuneo: What have you guys got against Brock, anyway? Maya: Basically, he's only there to get dumped on. Elana: Like a certain other person I know. > He took a chair and sat down. They all sat > there for a moment not saying anything. Finally, Darien said to Serena, > "Don't you think you should introduce us?" Dan: For the third time. Tsuneo: Wow. This fic is gonna have even *more* intense introduction action. > "Oh, yeah", Serena said, embarassed. "Darien, this is Ash, Misty, and > Brock. Ash, Misty, and Brock, this is my boyfriend Darien." Maya: [Brock] Whoops. > "You have a boyfriend?!!!" Brock exclaimed. "I'm sorry for asking you > out all those times." Dan: [Brock] Dang frrk frikkin' stupid... > Serena answered, "That's okay." > *** > Brock was on a mission. Tsuneo: Your mission, should you choose to accept it... > He'd been waiting for a long time, and he > knew he had to do it now. Dan: He needed to pee. > It was the perfect time. Everyone was > engaged in conversation, except Raye, who had her mouth full of ice > cream. Elana: That makes it a perfectly bad time, especially if he does his own laundry. > It was now or never. "Uh, Raye, could you come here for a > minute?" Brock asked nerveously. Raye got up and followed him to the > hallway before the restrooms. "I've been waiting for the right moment > to ask you this, but..." Dan: [Brock] Can I look up your skirt? I mean- Would you go out with me? > "Hurry up!!" Raye said. "I wanna finish my ice cream." > "Okay" Brock said. "Will you go out with me tonight?" Raye thought > for about two seconds and then said, Maya: [Raye] If there's nothing good on TV. Dan: [Brock] You hear that? She practically threw herself at me! Elana: [Lita] Pray for re-runs, hotshot. > "Sure, why not? It's not like I have anything else to do." Brock > started to jumping up and down, shouting at the top of his lungs, > "I got a date with a Sailor Scout!!!" Raye told him, Dan: Damn! Damn! That proves it all! Damn! Maya: So, Raye, which one's the lucky Scout? > "Would you tone it down a bit? I'm noy exactly too proud of going > out with you." Maya: Who would be? > But she really was. Elana: Back to slagging out the Sailor Scouts, I see? > *** > That night at 8:00 sharp, Brock picked up Raye. Dan: -By the head, and put her in a brainbuster! > They got in the > car, and for the first embarssing moment, Brock didn't turn the key > correctly, and got it stuck in the iggnition. Elana: Smooth. Yeah, I'm impressed. > He had to call Darien > to get it out. They got to the resterant okay, but Raye dropped her > earring while they were eating dinner, and Brock bent over to find > it. Dan: [Brock] Let's see... No earring, but I see two other nice things! WHACK! > The only problem was that as he was bending down, he knocked > everything off the table, and all the plates and glasses shattered > on the floor. Elana: About now, I'd walk out on him. Maya: Really? I'd be laughing. > The waiter wanted to make him pay for it, but the > manager felt sorry for him. Tsuneo: And only lightly killed him. > Phew. After dinner, Brock and Raye > decided to play mini golf. Humilliation #3 for Brock. While playing > a hole, he whacked Raye in the face with his club. Dan: Man, even I'm not this much of a goof. I mean- [Maya and Elana break out laughing] Dan: Damn. Tsuneo: Smooth with a capital Q there, Dan. > He offered to take her to the emergency room, but Raye said she was okay. Dan: [Brock] Besides, that bruise looks cute on you. WHACK! > Brock > asked what he could do for her, and she said she'd like a milkskake. Tsuneo: Let's see him stuff this one up. > Everything was going smoothly. They were doing 'That romantic thing > where there's two straws in a glass' as Raye once called it. But > Brock acidentally kicked Raye, and the shake spilled all over her. Dan: [Brock] Don't worry, I'll lick that up for you. WHACK! > Even worse, she had on a white shirt and it was a choclate shake. > Brock figured he should probly take Raye home now. Tsuneo: Nah, let's see him stuff up some more. > Thankfully, the > goodnight kiss went smoothly. Brock was mortified, but dispite the > horrible date, Raye was hopelessly in love with Brock. All: Huh? Elana: Yup, I think we can confirm this as an antific. > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > By, > Maury M. > To be continued in... > Part 4 > Author's Note: > To find out, read Part 4, Goodbye, garenteed to make you cry. Maya: Nope, I'm almost crying already. > P.S. Thanks for your e-mails!!! I really aprciate comments on my work. > Tell me how you liked it!!!! Elana: Or not, as the case may be. > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The TV switches off.] Dan: Well... Elana: that was bad. Maya: It was mild at worst. More pathetic than bad. Dan: It was kinda funny, when you think about it. But not how the author intended it. Voice: Can I have your reviews, then? Tsuneo: Well, I was out of my depth here, but I've got to say that it's a bad treatment of any series. The plot was insubstantial, the characterisation was threadbare, the formatting was horrid and there was no description at all. Maya: Added to that, the author puts in stupid asides and injects her own opinions into the fic. Like how she seemed compelled to do the mallet thing, then commented how much she hated it. Elana: I was really upset with the way the Sailor scouts were treated. It was pretty much a case of "insert generic argument here," that is when they weren't being made to look absolutely stupid or pathetic. Dan: Yeah. Well, it was so dull as well. Nothing really exciting or worthwhile happened. Just a big waste of a story. Voice: Thanks, guys. I'll post danger signs all over it. Dan: [To Tsuneo] You know, I was thinking... Tsuneo: Amazing. Dan: I've tried subtlety, I've tried being smooth, I've tried sending flowers and everything, but I think I could learn a lesson from Brock there. All I've got to do is be upfront and forward. [He turns towards Elana and Maya.] Ladies- Elana & Maya: No. Dan: Please? Maya: [Holds Elana's arm] Oh, I think she'd much rather go out with me. Dan: WHAT? Elana: [Blushes bright crimson] You? Maya: [Let's go] Just kidding. Elana: That's not funny! Dan: You could at least give me a chance... Tsuneo: [Sighs] Hopeless. [They all walk out, bickering.] [The screen goes blank.] Voice: I've got to get a better crew. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Riffed by: Jinas (rickr@one.net.au) Dan, Tsuneo, Elana & Maya are copyright 1995-1998 Max Fauth (Jinas) Jinas' world: http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Realm/2628/index.htm RPG info, amateur fanfics, MSTing site and official Bubblegum Crossfire material. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > "Sure, what ever you say!" Misty said cheerfully. But instead, of > pinching him, she whacked him over the head with a mallet. (I hate > that, don't you? It's really stupid, but it's in tons of anime)