Elmer Studios presents... ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Episode 108. Will the voice find a BGC 2040 fic? Will the reviewers kill him first? Recollections of a Tekkaman is copyright Brandon Atkinson Teknoman/Tekkaman Blade is copyright Sotsu-Tatsunoko Productions Inc. and Saban entertainment. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The scene - a well furnished apartment, with two couches in an L formation in front of a large cabinet that includes a wide-screen TV and video recorder. The apartment has a few doors to who-knows-where, and a small kitchenette. A coffee table sits in front of the two couches, and a desk, home to a well-equipped PC sits off to one side. There are two Silver Mallies resting on the bench in front of the kitchenette. A cardboard box sits by the bench, with the tattered pieces of tinsel sticking out and a trodden-on plastic Christmas tree lying next to it.] [Dan, Tsuneo, Rebecca and Rick enter, chatting] Rebecca: ...and since we finished up Delta Invasion, the four of us haven't done an EVA fic together. Dan: No way. we've done some since then. Rebecca: Yeah, we did a few chapters of Dorkside, but Rick wasn't there. Tsuneo: You're right there... Hmm... [They sit - Rebecca and Rick facing the TV, Dan & Tsuneo on the sideways couch.] Rick: So what have we had? Dan: A few BGC fics, that Slayers/Tenchi/Thane... er, thing, and a DV8 fic. Tsuneo: And those were some strange BGC fics to boot. Rick: So what does this mean? He's avoiding EVA fics? Rebecca: For us at least. Plus he's been sending us all kinds of just, well, strange fics. Rick: So what's going to be next? Tsuneo: Something outrageously strange and freaky that we don't want to see. Dan: What, like... a Brain Powerd self insert? Rebecca: Yeah, where the SI is the offspring of Joanna Dark and Chriton from Farscape. Rick: Or the EVA/Slayers fic where the EVA characters get dumped in the Slayers world. Tsuneo: No way, they'd never survive. Rebecca: Are you kidding? Slayers favours idiots, so Shinji's safe; maniacal red-heads, so Asuka's safe; and Rei finally gets to use her shamanic magic. Tsuneo: Huh? Dan: So what about Misato? Rebecca: She's the comic relief, no-one can hurt her. Rick: So what about... Say, a Gen-13/Dirty Pair crossover? Tsuneo: Don't laugh, it'll be a professional work. Rick: Okay, then... I've got it! The Authority/JLA team-up: Crisis on Lots and Lots of Infinite Earths! Dan: Doesn't infinite automatically mean lots and lots? Rebecca: It's The Authority. There has to be more. Tsuneo: Well, it doesn't have to be a crossover. We've had more than enough goofy normal fics. Dan: Well what about a goofy romance? Rebecca: Let's see, Lina/Xellos; Lina/Xellos; Lina/Xellos; Lina/Xellos; Gaurry/Amelia - how'd that happen? - and Lina/Xellos. Dan: Good point. Nothing worthwhile there. Tsuneo: Well, for a really out-there fic, you could have one from an unusual point of view. Rick: Like what? Tsuneo: Like an El Hazard fic from the point of view of a bugrom. Dan: Yeah, that'd go places. "Day one: served the queen. Day two: served the queen. Day three: served the queen." Tsuneo: I meant one of the important bugrom, like Groucho. Dan: Oh, that's much better. "Day one: got beat up by red-haired priestess. Day two: got beat up by red-haired priestess. Day three:-" Tsuneo: Oh, forget it. Rebecca: So how about a fic of a remake-series? Rick: What like Dirty Pair Flash? Rebecca: Yeah, the DP Flash fic, featuring an under-aged midget version of Shasti. Rick: And she runs around killing innumerable innocents in an outrageously cute and sweet way while flashing around her panties. Dan: Cool. Rick: Or some new Macross fic. Tsuneo: Yeah, the bland and nondescript crew of a brand new ship meet a new kind of uninteresting alien in random part of the galaxy. Voice: How about "none of the above?" Rebecca: Well good morning project 2501. How long have you been there? Voice: Long enough to be bored senseless. Tsuneo: The feeling's mutual. So what *is* it? Voice: Just for something unusual- Rick: Big surprise. Voice: I've found you a Tekkaman fic called "Recollections of a Tekkaman." [The TV switches on] Rick: Don't you mean a "Teknoman" fic? Voice: Erm... Well, the authour can't decide. > Recollections of a Tekkaman By Brandon Atkinson > Copyrights: -Teknoman / Tekkaman-Blade and related characters are property of > Sotsu-Tatsunoko Productions Inc. / Saban entertainment. > NOTE: This story contains a fair amount of bad language - you have been warned! > This is my first FanFic, so it may not be as good as others you might have read. Tsuneo: On the other hand, it can't be as bad as some of the ones we've seen. > Also opinions (good or bad) are greatly welcomed. Email me at > autobot_city@hotmail.com. > Recollections of a Tekkaman By Brandon Atkinson > PROLOGUE Rick: It is a dark time for the Galaxy. The evil GALACTIC EMPIRE has begun... Rebecca: Thank you, Rick. > In Global Year 193, Rick: Bob to its friends. > Aliens known as Radam invaded the Earth Dan: You can't blame them. It's the only good parking in the Western Spiral Arm. > and turned most of > the population into "Primary Bodies"(partially transformed humans that lack many > of the abilities that fully transformed humans gain when they become Tekkamen. > Humans that were completely transformed into Tekkamen ended up with super > powerful weapons and nearly impenetrable armor.) Tsuneo: They also end up with lots of Angst. Rebecca: And good hair. > Then, The Radam Warlord named Darkon (who was sent to supervise the invasion) Rick: He's not a Radam he's a human! Dan: Remember? They didn't get to see all the series in America. Rick: I guess that counts as a spoiler then... > and his evil Tekkamen Warriors (Gunnar, Saber, Ax, Lance, Rapier, and Sword) Tsuneo: Plus the Radam B-Team, Guaive-Gusarme, Hook Forchard, Pointed Stick and Mancatcher Rick: Hey, what about Rift and Zar? > were defeated by the 'renegade' Tekkaman named Blade with the help of the Space > Knights - a group of sorts, whose sole purpose is exploration and research. Tsuneo: So why do they have such a huge arsenal? Dan: To find new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilisations... and blow them up. > The Radam returned 10 years later, in Global Year 203, this time with a large > battle fleet, and were again, defeated by a newly formed team of Space Knights > and their Tekkamen Dan: Tekkaman Blade 2, with Fan Service Action! > - They found a SAFE way to transform the Primary Bodies into Full Tekkamen. Rebecca: In a bizarre process involving a particle accelerator and a powdered non-dairy creamer. A lot of the unsuccessful tests ended up dead, funny looking or, most often, dead and funny looking. > However these weren't the only times that the Radam came to Earth. For they had > come once before... Dan: They dropped by about 2000 BC to build a few pyramids and the Easter Island Stoneheads, as well as sink Atlantis and Lemuria. > In the year 2000 (later to be referred to as Global Year 0 by historians), Rick: Any reason? Tsuneo: They lost count. Rick: Oh. > an unknown object fell to the Earth, Rick: High above tiny Macross Island... > which was still staggering from the disastrous > blow received courtesy of the Year 2000 computer glitch, Rebecca: Oh yeah, we all remember how devastating the Y2K bug was. [They all snigger] > from space and almost obliterated the southern polar region. Tsuneo: So which series is this we're working from? Dan: Hey voice, I thought you said no more EVA fics? Voice: It's not! Honest! > The water level around the world was > raised drastically, causing massive destruction and other natural disasters. > Most of the global population perished because of these events. Tsuneo: The media said it was a giant asteroid but we all know that it was the First Angel. Rebecca: Never mind that the world maps seen in the show don't reflect the kind of changes that such a rise in sea level would have caused. [Pause] And New York is clearly identifiable, even though it would have been destroyed. > This disaster became to be known as 'The Cataclysm'. Rick [Teacher from Evangelion]: I remember The Cataclysm well... Tsuneo: I don't like you. > Shortly afterward, most of the people of > earth moved on and resumed their normal lives, Dan: Those who hadn't died in the floods. > trying to forget the destruction > that was caused. However, some people could not move on because something > unusual had happened to them. Dan: They were drowned by the rising sea levels? Rick: Besides that, he means. Dan: Oh. > Something terrible, that changed their lives forever. > 10 years after The Cataclysm, one person's life was forever changed... Rebecca: Just to repeat the point, their lives were changed forever. Tsuneo: And ten years after The Cataclysm at that. Rick: Yes, it was ten years after The Cataclysm that their lives were forever changed. Dan: Okay, we get the picture. > ______________________________________________________________________________________ > Chapter 1: The Nightmare Begins Rick: But we call it a fanfic. > Spring 2010 Tsuneo: Ten years after The Cataclysm. Rebecca: When everyone's' lives were- Dan: SHUT UP! > Somewhere in the expanse of what used to be Northern Ontario, Tsuneo: So if it isn't Northern Ontario anymore, what is it? Rebecca: It's been annexed by Manitoba. Rick: We join our hero as he bravely forges a path across the vast Canadian wilderness... Dan [General Carville]: It's Canada! There are more cows up here than people. > A man sat at a > folding table beside a tent. In the dimming firelight, he was drawing a map of > the area. Tsuneo: Don't you want better light to work with? Rebecca [Reading]: "Here be Dragons". > Next to the map was a half empty bottle of Wiser's Oldest(c) Blended > Canadian Whisky. > "Ever since The Cataclysm, existing maps haven't been reliable, Dan: Well, for starters, they still have California marked on them. > so now I am out here making new ones..." He thought to himself. Rick: Why not use satellite imaging to create maps? It's what we do these days. > "Ha! And my teachers said I'd never make it through high school! Rebecca: [Man] And now look at me, out in the middle of nowhere! Er, wait a second... > Boy did I prove them wrong! Now look at me, > after spending the first 5 years of this millennium at college, I'm a freaking > map maker!" Dan [Ultros]: G'fahaha! Look at me! I'm a receptionist! Tsuneo: I think someone's venting. > He said while beaming with a sense of pride. > He was Brandon Atkinson, Rick: And we have self-insertion! [They all cheer] > Professional Cartographer. Dan: Brandon Atkinson, Professional Cartographer, international man of mystery. > He was a man of about 30 > years of age with brown hair and eyes. Dan: So... he had eyes? Rebecca: That seems to be the gist of it. > He had been hired by the local government > to make a detailed survey of the area. He was being paid a lot of money in the > new global currency that had been adopted shortly after Y2K (not to mention all > the unknown computer viruses that were activated by it) screwed the planet over, > in order to avoid the confusion while the World Banks' computers were down. Tsuneo: Well there's a weighty and improbable sentence for you. Rick: And you thought the Australian Dollar had problems now... > But now, all of the really important computers were fixed (took long enough!). Rick: Every helpdesk on the planet must have been snowed under. > Brandon looked over to a small display that was next to the map as he reached > for the whisky bottle. Tsuneo: His shares must be doing that well. Dan [Brandon]: Shouldn't have sank all my money into dot coms. > It was a portable GPS display. It displayed an > approximation of his location and at which latitudinal and longitudinal points > he was at. Rick: Well, according to this he's in... Kazakstan? > "Good thing this system is still working... without it I'd be really lost." Rebecca: That sounds like foreshadowing to me. > he > commented as he took a swig of whisky. He put the bottle back of the table. Tsuneo: No one will be admitted during the intense whisky drinking scene! Dan: He belched. He scratched himself. He did stuff. > He > continued his work for a while, then picked up his map to go and put it away. As > he did so, he knocked the bottle of whisky over and its contents happened to > splash all over the GPS display. Rick: Smooth move there. Seriously smooth. Tsuneo: Remember kids, never drink and use advanced navigational equipment. > There was a popping and crackling sounds and > smoke began to rise out of the back of the display. Dan: Nicely called, Rebecca. > The GPS display then suddenly exploded into many fragments. Rick: Brandon, there are these little things called fuses. You might want to look into them. > "SHIT!" He said as he covered his face with his arms, dropping his map on the > ground.. Rick: And as if his day wasn't bad enough, he spilt some on his lap. > After the smoke cleared, he surveyed the damage. The table had a blast mark on > it where the GPS display had been. Rebecca: That's some mighty powerful stuff you've got there. > "It was bound to happen, stupid freaking piece of crap!" He said. Rick: What? You've been pouring whiskey on your GPS unit for a while? Dan: Yeah, he makes a hobby of it. > Not only was > he disappointed about the loss of the GPS, but also about the loss of his only > bottle of whisky! Tsuneo: Good to see that he's got his priorities straight. Dan: Heck yeah, I'd be upset if I was out in the woods and couldn't get a good drink. Tsuneo: You amaze me, Dan, you really, really do. > "Hmmm... I thought only water made electronic things go screwy....guess I > thought wrong." He said. Tsuneo: Use your brain. > He picked up his map and went over to the spot where he had stored his supplies > and pulled out an old atlas, and brought it back to the table. He opened it up > to the map of Canada Rebecca: Not to sound nitpicky, but wouldn't it be more useful to open it up to the specific part of Canada you're in? Tsuneo: It's one of those Atlases that has every street in each of the US's state capitals *and* Washington DC marked, but is rather vague about the rest of the world. Rebecca: Figures. Rick: You should check this one out. It's got the USSR, East Germany *and* South Vietnam in it. > and checked his longitudinal and latitudinal coordinates > with what the GPS had showed him. Dan [Brandon]: Well, according to this, I'm somewhere between the Taj Mahal and the Panama Canal. > According to the old atlas, he was at points W84.6 x N51.1, which was near > Hudson's Bay (which is a lot bigger now). Rick: Gee, that narrows it down to, what, half of Canada? Rebecca: He's somewhere between Moose Factory and Uranium City. Look it up. > After he checked this, he decided to call it a night and put everything SAFELY > away in the packs. Rebecca: First the eggs, then the watermelon. > He then got the packs ready to be loaded into the canoe the > next day. Then he put out the fire and went to bed. Tsuneo [Bored silly]: Wow. I can't stand the intensity of this action. Dan: And during the night, the canoe floated off. God, he sucks. > *** > In the morning Brandon broke camp and set off down the river in his canoe. The > current was moving fast and he was enjoying it. Every so often he would stop and > take a break and update his map. Dan: Given that he's lost his oh-so-important GPS system, wouldn't it be smarter to go back home and get a new one? Tsuneo: That's what he's trying. He's got a lousy sense of direction for a cartographer. Rick [Brandon]: Let's see, I'll put a few more squiggly bits in over here, and a lost Inca city over there and... > Later that afternoon, Brandon reached a part of the river that had split into 2 > different directions. Rick: To the west lies the unknown, the path to adventure and excitement. Dan: And to the East? Rick: A convenience store. > He decided to take the path on the left. Dan: GO LEFT. Rick: There is a raging river ahead of you. In front of you is a stack of wood, some rope, a gramophone and a frost free fridge. Directions: AHEAD, RIGHT. > After a while, however, he began to regret that decision Rebecca [Brandon]: Maybe I shouldn't have taken the path with the big "Danger Minefield" sign over it. > due to the fact that the current was picking up very > quickly and the canoe becoming hard to handle. Rebecca: Down! Back! Bad canoe! Bad! > The situation went from > inconvenient to bad as the canoe went through a series of rapids and jagged > rocks sticking up in the raging surf. Dan: Is it just me, or can't Brandon here seem to do anything right? > Brandon and his canoe were being bumped from rock to rock pretty harshly. Rick: Tilt. > Then he hit a rock very hard and the front > left side of the canoe was ripped to shreds. Rebecca: Brandon, here's a little tip. Never use a canoe made out of paper. Sure it's cheap, but in the long term it's not going to do you any good. > The canoe was now useless as a water craft but not as a Rick: Pot plant holder. Dan: Conversation piece. Rebecca: Ant farm. Tsuneo: Weapon in a Jackie Chan movie. Rebecca: You win. > floatation device. Brandon held onto the side of the > destroyed canoe while he was tossed though the rough water. After a while of > 'playing' driftwood, Rebecca: He came up to a waterfall! Dan: Opening next week at the independent Theatre: My Life as a Log, starring Brandon Atkinson as Driftwood, Colt as Lumber and with Rift and Zar as assorted debris. Rick: Rift and Zar rocked. They made that fic. > Brandon emerged from the rapids he was a little beat up but otherwise ok. Rick [Brandon]: It's just a few broken limbs. Nothing major. > The current was still moving fast, and Brandon was having trouble > trying to keep his head above water, even though he was a pretty good swimmer, > so he didn't really see the waterfall ahead. [Dead silence] Tsuneo: Dan, you're right. He can't do anything right. Rick: Okay, wiseguy, what now? > One moment he was being carried by the current and the next he was falling. Dan [Brandon]: Dum de dum, it's a lovely day, hey is that a waterfaaaaaaa... Tsuneo [Deadpan]: This man's an idiot. > Brandon plunged into a pool or something at the bottom of the waterfall. Tsuneo: Well, if it's not a pool, then what is it? Rebecca: A hole? Dan: A depression? Rick: A frost-free fridge? Tsuneo: Rick, what is it with you and those things? [Rick shrugs] > He went > down pretty deep and as he started to float back to the surface, he felt > something grab his leg. Rebecca: Well, it's either an overly affectionate octopus or you've landed on Chuthulu's head. Dan: Knowing Brandon? Rebecca: 1D4 per round. > he looked down to see what it was but couldn't see > anything because of the murky water. > He tried to get out of its grasp but could not. Dan: Gasp with terror as Brandon wrestles with a rubber octopus! Rick: Shudder in fear as Brandon confronts the wilds of Canada. Tsuneo: Eat popcorn with indifference as Brandon makes camp. Rebecca: Recollections of a Teknoman, coming soon to a theatre near you. Rated D for dull. > The thing continued to wrap around his leg Rebecca: Voice, you're not giving us a gay tentacle lemon are you? Voice: Never! Tsuneo: Don't even think of going there. > and he passed out as it pulled him deeper into the abyss. > End Chapter 1 Rebecca: Well that was easy. [They all get up to leave] Voice: Not so fast, guys. The Authour was kind enough to pack three chapters into the one file for you. Tsuneo: That's just peachy. [They all sit] With any luck, something might happen this chapter. > ______________________________________________________________________________________________ > Recollections of a Tekkaman By Brandon Atkinson > Chapter 2: Transformation > Time and Place: Unknown Rick: With rain expected on the coast, followed by clear skies and a sunny afternoon. > When Brandon regained consciousness, he found that he could breathe, Dan: It'd be pretty odd if you regained consciousness and found that you *couldn't* breathe. > and that he was in some kind of reddish-orange colored liquid Tsuneo: Well, the party was going well until they found Brandon face-down in the fruit punch. It all went downhill from there. > that was faintly glowing. Rick: Better make that radioactive fruit punch. Rebecca: OK, who's been buying Ukranian canned fruit again? > He tried to remember how he got into this situation but his memory kept drawing > a blank. Rick: He was at a party. He had drunk a bit too much. He had a traffic cone. Dan: Yeah, a lot of weird situations start that way. > Then, some reddish colored strands were wrapping themselves around his > body. Rebecca: Look at that. He's beewn abducted by aliens who are gift-wrapping him. Isn't that nice? > He tried to struggle but found that he couldn't move, because the > strand-like things were preventing him from making any movement. Tsuneo: Well... yes, actually. That's makes a surprising amount of sense. Dan: In a totally pointless way, of course. > He was kept > like that for a long time, so to keep him from going crazy due to endless > boredom, Rebecca: It's like being on an international flight where the movie's Waterworld. > he looked back into the memories of his life. Tsuneo: Cue the sentimental music, folks. Rebecca: To save money, we're going to clip stock footage from Isamu Mitsurugi, Tom Dyron, John Barren and Jimbo Beckket's backstories. > He saw happy moments like > the birth of his little brother, the new beagle puppy his dad brought home, his > graduation from high school, Tsuneo: This is touching. Rick: Anyone got anything to eat? > and sad moments like the deaths of his family in > the massive earth quake that struck the region where his family lived in 2001, All: THE BIG ONE! > their funerals, and the burials of some of his friends who had also died in the > quake. Tsuneo: In other words the sort of fiercely generic tragic background we've come to expect from fics like this. Rick: Seems that way. > Brandon barely choked back a sob as he watched these events. Then the pain began. Dan: No, that happened at the start of the fic. > Brandon experienced pain unlike which he had never know existed. Rick [Dr Forrester]: Prepare for deep hurting, boobies! Rebecca: They beamed all seven seasons of Deep Space Nine into his head. The inhumane bastards. > It seemed as if every nerve in his body was on fire. Dan: That happens to me whenever I eat cheap Mexican food. [Tsuneo edges away from him] Tsuneo: Thanks for that. Rebecca: Maybe they just shoved him into an Agonizer Booth. > The excruciating pain continued for sometime, [Rebecca loudly sips a soft drink. Everyone else looks at her] Rebecca: What? What? > not allowing him to fall into the unconsciousness > which he sought, but it did almost make him go insane. All [Singing]: It's almost like being insane... > Once, he thought he saw a > spider-like creature (like something out of the Alien movies) move toward him. Tsuneo: Everyone rips those things off. Isn't there any originality left in monster design? > It suddenly stopped advancing toward him, though it did certainly make an > attempt to continue its path, it seemed as if it had been stopped by an > invisible wall. Rick: Oh great. He's being menaced by alien arachnid monster mimes! > Then it made a startled sound or something and disappeared suddenly. Tsuneo: Well that achieved a lot. Rebecca: Poor little critter frightens easily. > The pain continued through this but Brandon no longer cared as he was > becoming used to this level of pain. Dan [Brandon, bored]: Ho hum, unimaginable pain and agony, whatever. > He began to drift into a forced slumber and > as he did so, he thought he heard in his mind a woman's voice that said: > "It will be all right. The worst is over, sleep now. I will not let it hurt you > anymore." Rebecca: Awww, did the big bad alien monster hurt you? Let mummy kiss you better. Dan: [Leans towards Rebecca] Yes please. [She whacks him with a cushion] > And with that, Brandon completely fell asleep. > *** > When Brandon awoke, he found himself lying on the bank of the lagoon near the > waterfall. Rick: You know, this is actually a pretty nice spot. And if not for the hideous alien monster lurking under the waterfall, I'd say that we have the company picnic here next year. Dan: On the other hand, we could feed Tango to the Monster. Tsuneo: That is a bit cruel, you know. Dan: True. I suppose the poor monster didn't do anything to us. > He got up and looked around. He saw only the forest and the river and > the waterfall. Rick: And... The Winged Vicotry of Samathrace! Tsuneo: Oh come on, no one would fall for that. Dan: Where? Where? Tsuneo: Never mind. > The waterfall looked to be about 30 feet high. > "Holy Shit. I survived that?!" He thought. Rebecca: Yeah, you landed on your head. > Brandon happened to look down into the water at the edge of the bank just then > and got a surprise. Rick: Giant mutant squid attack! > The reflection in the water was not of a human face, but > that of an armored person! Dan: He's about to be jumped by the Knights who say Ni! Rick & Rebecca: Ni! Ni! Tsuneo [British]: Run away! Run away! > Not only did he feel different but he looked different too. Rick [Brandon]: Since when was I a woman? Dan: I don't think that was any old pool he fell into... Tsuneo: No. We are not having a Ranma/Teknoman crossover. Not even if you ask nicely. > "What the..." He half-whispered in amazement. He then noticed that his voice > sounded different. Rebecca: Puberty must have finally kicked in. > Brandon knelt down and continued to stare at his reflection for sometime. Dan [Brandon]: Hey, I'm pretty buff. > Then > he noticed that the diamond-shaped thing on his forehead was blinking slowly on > and off, Dan: That's just your car alarm. If its blinking like that you know that it's been set and is still working. > he then felt a presence near him. Rebecca [Brandon]: I sense a presence... One that I have not felt since... Dan: That might be the huge hairy guy breathing over your shoulder, buddy. > He stood up and looked around, but couldn't see anyone. Tsuneo: Pay no attention to the man hiding behind the bush. > He now felt a second presence. > "This is way too weird, like something out of the Highlander movies." He thought > to himself. Rick: It's the Highlander Immortal Sense! VVrrrrooooom! > He then wished that he was holding a weapon of some kind and suddenly a bladed > weapon appeared in his right hand. Tsuneo: ...Well that was easy. Dan: Say, where were you keeping that uber-powerful Tekka-weapon anyway? Rick: That's none of your damned business. > It looked like a scimitar but was made out of > roughly hewn jade. Rebecca: Yeah... Oh that's great. A weapon made out of a heavy, fragile stone. Good choice there. > Brandon took one look at his new weapon and said: "Cool." > Then he said in a loud voice: > "I know you're there. Show yourselves this instant!" > He sensed movement nearby and saw two armored figures step out from behind the > waterfall. Tsuneo: Hey check it out, guys. They've got a nice little place back there. > One was male, holding a sword in each hand. He was covered in black, > blue, and white armor. The other armored figure, was definitely female, Dan: And trust me, Brandon noticed. Rebecca: Hey, it could be just a cross-dressing Tekkaman. > was wearing yellow, pink, orange, and red armor. Rebecca: She looked like an explosion in a boutique. > She had long red hair. She was > holding a long elaborate-looking staff, which had a large sparkling jewel on its > top. Dan: So how come the guy gets a brief description, whereas the girl gets a few more lines and a weapon? Tsuneo: Because he's the buddy who dies in the first reel, and she's the love interest. Rick: Look out! She's got a pointed stick! > "Who are you and what do you want?" Brandon asked. Dan [British]: What are you doing in England? Rick [French]: Mind your own business! > Instinctively he held his weapon in front of him in a defensive position. > "We are not here to fight you." The male figure said. > "Then why are you here?" Brandon asked, a little confused. Tsuneo [Man]: We live here. Dan [Brandon]: Oh. > "We are here to help you. I am Blaze and this is IceBlade, whom you know by > another name." The female figure spoke. Rebecca: He used to job mercilessly in the WWF as "ColdSword". > "He doesn't look like anyone I'd know." Brandon responded. > The person known as Blaze nodded to the one called IceBlade. Suddenly IceBlade > was engulfed in a column of white light. Dan: There was this bright light, and then aliens took me on board their ship, and then they made me watch Kevin Costner movies and force-fed me horrible substances... Tsuneo: That was your last trip on an airliner. Dan: Oh yeah. > when the column of light faded, where > the armored warrior stood, there was now a human in his place. He looked about > 30, had short hazel-brown hair, and was wearing jeans, boots, and a sweater. Rebecca: Being a male Tekkaman, he's not subject to the "Loose clothes when transforming" clause. > "Now do I look like anyone you'd know?" he asked. > Brandon strained his memory to find any reference to the person who was standing > before him. Dan [Brandon]: Nnnnnggggggggnnnngnggggggg... Nope. I don't get it at all. > He got a response. It hit him like a ton of bricks! Rebecca: Metric or imperial? Rick [Brandon]: And then it hit me like 2200 pounds of rectangular-prism shaped baked-clay building materials! > This was his best friend before the dark times, before The Cataclysm. Dan: Before the dark reign of Grunthor, the high priest of Neidorn the God of Death in the kingdom of Krondor and... > "Carter? Is that you?" he asked. > "Hello, old friend, It's been a while." > "By the Gods! I haven't seen you since the quake." Rick: He's spent the last ten years stuck in a network deathmatch party. Dan: Some people have all the luck. > "I am sure you must have questions, But first what is your name?" Blaze > interrupted. Rick: What is your quest? What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? Tsuneo: That does it. No more all night Monty Python binges for you two. > "Well, my name is..." Brandon started to reply. "I am..." He tried again. "Why > can't I remember my own name?" He asked even more confused. Rebecca: Well what does it say on your shirt? Rick [Brandon]: Let's see... according to this, my name is "Machine Washable Do Not Tumble Dry Product Of China". > "All will be explained in due time." Blaze said. > "Well, what name do you get when you try to remember who you are?" IceBlade > asked. Rick [Brandon]: Um... Gladys. Dan [IceBlade]: Damn, you are screwed up. Rick [Brandon]: Well at least my name has correct capitalisation. > "I get the name 'Shard'." He replied. > "That's the name that you were given by the TeknoPod. You are no longer who you > used to be." Blaze said. Rebecca: I guess Brandon had The Operation. [The others cross their legs] > "Think of it as assuming a new identity." IceBlade said. Dan: [Brandon] Do I get as choice in this? Rick: No. Next? > He shrugged his shoulders and said: "Ok. I am Shard... wait a minute, What's a > Teknopod? and what the hell have I become?!?" Rick: Don't ask and annoying. Dan: Fine. [Pause] What was the question? > Blaze smiled beneath her helmet, and with that she began to explain about what > he and they were. Rebecca [Blaze]: OK, Shard, have you ever watched an episode of Power Rangers? Rick [Shard]: Uh, yeah. Rebecca [Blaze]: Well, that's close enough. > End chapter 2 > ________________________________________________________________________________________________ > Recollections of a Tekkaman By Brandon Atkinson Tsuneo: Say, um, why is he jumping constantly between the American and Japanese names and terminology? Rick: You get used to it after a while in Robotech fics. > Chapter 3 - Blaze Dan: Hello armoured nurse! > The day was growing very late as the air sung with the sound of blades clashing > as IceBlade and Shard were in the midst of a training battle Tsuneo: Look, guys, no matter how many rounds of Soul Calibur you play, it's no substitute for the real thing. Rick: Hey look, they've got a Dreamcast. [They all snigger, except for Tsuneo] Tsuneo: ... > (one of many in which IceBlade almost always won). Rick: That's because IceBlade used a foreign object. Dan [IceBlade]: N2 Mine? What N2 mine? I don't see any N2 mine. > Shard blocked a knockout blow from his > friend, and broke away to begin his counter-attack. He suddenly disappeared in a > blur of lines, Rebecca: Amazing. We get speed lines in fanfiction. > and suddenly reappeared behind a startled IceBlade. "Wha-! > Where'd he go?" IceBlade said. Rick: He's about to leap in from the other side of the screen. Dan: You know, there used to be a time when Scorpion rocked. Nowadays, all he's good for is hanging around with Smoke, Ermac and Noob Saibot and getting stoned. > "RIGHT HERE!" Shard exclaimed. He was about to deliver his own knockout punch > when someone said "ENOUGH!" The person who said that stepped out of the > tree-line as IceBlade and Shard changed back into their human forms. Rick [IceBlade]: Sorry, Mum. Dan [Shard]: He started it. > She was the > Teknoman known as Blaze. Now in her human form, she was strikingly beautiful. At > least Shard thought so when he first saw her. Rick: She's a female Tekkaman. She looses all her clothes in transformation. You'd think that too. [Rebecca whacks him with a cushion.] Well it's true! > She had long auburn hair, was of slim build and she wore the same survival > outfit as IceBlade when he was human. Tsuneo: Don't you guys ever change your clothes? Damn, you people are beginning to smell. > "It's time for the evening meal. Get cleaned up, while I'll make us something to > eat." Blaze stated. She went back to the campsite and began to rummage around in > the supplies. Rebecca [Blaze]: Cheese in a spray-can... Fruit-shaped Marshmallow chunks... Tinned sausages... Toasty toppers... Damn, what is all this crap? > Later while The trio of warriors were eating their dinner of improvised soup and > Bannock - a hard, flat type of bread that is cooked in a frying pan Rick: And occasionally used as an offensive weapon. > - Shard asked a question. Dan [Shard]: Are those real? Me and IceBlade have a bet going. [Rebecca hits him with a cushion.] > "Blaze, do you know where the Teknopod that transformed me came from?" He asked. > "I know its not like anything that's native to Earth." Rebecca: Actually, the Teknopod is closely related to the common English Triffid. > Blaze had told him what the Teknopods were and what he and IceBlade and herself > were, but not where they had come from. Tsuneo: Gee, do we have to tell Shard everything? Okay, when a Mummy and a Daddy love each other very much... Dan: So if they knew that thing was there, why'd they leave it to trap other people? > "Shard, do you remember what you heard about 'The Cataclysm' ?" IceBlade asked. Rick [Shard]: I remember something about a lot of water... > "Only that shortly after the Investigative Team arrived, they disappeared. No > sign of them was ever found." Replied Shard. Tsuneo: There were a number of very fat, way too smug-looking penguins, however. > "In order to answer your question Shard, I must tell you about what happened at > Antarctica 10 years ago which resulted in the Investigative Team's > disappearance." She said. > "My name used to be Julia Winchester, and I was the leader of that Investigative > Team." Blaze started. Rick: And what do you know, ten years after disappearing she turns up under a rock in Canada! > "WHAT?!" Exclaimed Shard. Julia Winchester was the best archeologist in the > world, about a decade ago. Dan: She preferred to get around in a tank top and way-too-tight shorts. Tsuneo: That's archeologist, Dan, not tomb robber. > The media reported that she and her team had > disappeared while on an archaeological dig in the Andes Mountains in South > America, Rick: The offical story is that they were gored to death by wild llamas. Dan: So did she vanish in Antarctica, or was it South America? > very shortly after "The Cataclysm." Tsuneo: It's not just any old Cataclysm, it's "The Cataclysm". > "Shard, settle down and let me explain." She said. Rick: Listen very carefully, for this is the plot. > "The United Nations called my > team in to assist in an investigation of whatever was in what was left of > Antarctica. > We were joined up with the best scientists and researchers in the > world. Our group jumped from 10 to about 50 members. Dan: Experience point leeches, the lot of them Rebecca: This is what happens when hiring henchmen and attracting followers gets out of control. > When we arrived in Antarctica, we got a total surprise. What we were to take a > look at, was not some huge meteorite that had crashed as some people had > thought, it was Tsuneo: The first angel, Adam. Rick: The muffler off a 58 Edsel. Dan: Just a weather balloon. Really. Rebecca: I'd go with the former. It's easier to believe in. > a damaged alien spaceship. Rick: -Nearly three quarters of a mile long. The outer hull had taken the brunt of the impact, leaving most of the valuable high-tech systems inside intact. > For the first few days we did our > preliminary work, analyzing the spacecraft's outer hull and conducting assorted > experiments and such. Rebecca [Blaze]: After three days we came to an important conclusion. It was a spaceship. > Then, we were ordered to begin preparations to enter the damaged vessel." Tsuneo: This sounds like the set up for innumerable bad science-fiction films. > She paused briefly then she said: > "The rest, I can't put into words so I will have to show you." > "Huh? What do you mean, show me?" Shard asked. Rick: She's going to show you her home movies, that's what. > Blaze closed her eyes and then her expression blanked. Dan [Shard]: Hello? Hello? Anyone there? Hello? > The ghostly outlined > shape of a Tekno-crystal formed on her forehead. One also formed on Shard's > forehead. Rick: [Shard] So this must be what it's like inside a bong... > "Brace yourself, I went through the same as what you are about to." warned > IceBlade > Suddenly shard's mind was filled with images and sounds -- Blaze had initiated a > mind-link, Shard realized. Rebecca [Blaze]: My mind to your mind... my thoughts to your thoughts... > In Short order, they sorted themselves out and Shard began to make sense of > them... Rick: Blaze's mind was in PAL format but he only had NTSC. > *** > 10 years ago... Tsuneo: When the lives of a few people were changed- [Dan hits him with a cushion] > "Command Base, this is Alpha Team. We've reached the site and are preparing to > enter the vessel." Julia Winchester asked through her helmet radio. Tsuneo: That didn't sound like a question to me. Rick: She asked in a very definite sense. > "Good luck Alpha, and be careful." Came the crackled reply. > "Thanks." Julia switched off her radio and turned to her team. There were about > 50 people in the group. Rebecca: Figuring out the marching order must have been a pain. > "All right people, get yourselves together. We are going in through one of the > ruptures in this side of the ship's hull." She announced. > They carefully made their way into the alien ship. Rick: Ensign Throwaway, take the lead. > They slowly traveled through what appeared to be a large passageway that was > covered in algae-like stuff. Tsuneo: Care to be any more vague? Dan: It generic luminous moss. Every generic dungeon has it. > "This is incredible." Thought Julia. > Eventually they made their way to a large low-lit room. There were giant > purplish things hanging from the ceiling like chandeliers. Rick: This is a remarkably well decorated enigmatic alien object. > "This is incredible." Said Matthew Dressing - another member of the Research > Team. He touched one of the low hanging purplish things. "Fascinating." He > half-whispered. > "Matt, don't touch anything!" Julia hissed. Tsuneo: [Matt] You could have told me that five minutes ago. > "Sorry." Matt said apologetically. He then moved away to look at something else. Dan [Makes crashing noises] Rebecca [Julia]: Matt, what did I say? Dan [Matt]: Sorry! > Suddenly, the purple things on the ceiling began to glow simultaneously as a > primitive growl began to emanate from all around the room. Rick: Okay, who let rip? Tsuneo: That was just Matt's stomach growling. > "What's happening?" Julia half-whispered. Dan [Matt]: Not me! > Then, the purple things began falling from the ceiling... Rebecca: Careful with that stuff. Not just does it stink to high heven, it also is impossible to get off your clothes. Rick: No need to panic, they've just walked into a room where the paint on the ceiling's wet, that's all. > They were creatures of some kind! Dan: Incredibly mixed up creatures, no less. > And they started chasing after the Research Team! Tsuneo: Didn't I see this in about a million bad science fiction films? > Screams of fear, surprise and terror Rick: And occasionally indigestion. Dan [Creature]: Yummy! > filled the room as the members of the > ill-fated research team were swallowed up one by one. Dan: Gotta catch 'em all. > Frightened people began to run in all directions, looking for any way to get > out. Tsuneo: Why not go back through the hole you came in? Rebecca: You'd be surprised how few people think of that. > Julia and Matthew ran from the horror that was following them. They didn't > get very far. Rebecca: It's the world's fastest shambling eldritch horror. > They got to the place where the entrance to the passageway used to > be but it was gone. Dan [Matt]: Curses! They put up a... door! [They all gasp in mock horror] > They were trapped! Suddenly they were surrounded. 6 or so of > the creatures advanced on their location. There was no way out. A tentacle came > out of nowhere and pulled Matthew into the shadows. Rebecca: It's that over-amorous octopus again. Dan: Thanks for that, Rebecca. Rick [Ultros]: Game over, kiddies! Don't tease the octopus! > "Julia! HELP ME!" he screamed as he was pulled into the darkness. > "MATT!" Julia cried out. > Julia reached for her firearm only to have it knocked out of her hand by one of > the pods' tentacles. Rebecca: And here's her without even a handy fire extinguisher. Rick: Don't you know? Always enter an alien space ship with an assault rifle, a flamethrower, a shotgun, two pistols, a half dozen grenades, a knife, a motion detector and low-light goggles? Tsuneo: Say, um, is it just me or didn't they bring any trained soldiers with them in the advent that something like this might just possibly happen? > "Damn!" She thought. > Just then , she happened to look up and saw one of the larger creatures > descending from the ceiling, right on top of her! Dan: Death from above! Rick: Come on, everyone knows that when you think you've escaped the slavering monster it drops on you. She should have thought of that. > There wasn't even enough time for her to let out a scream. Rebecca: Say, how long does it take to scream? Tsuneo: Longer than she's got, apparently. > Then there was nothing but darkness. *** Tsuneo: So... It's just Blade's origin story with the ship being in Antarctica instead of in orbit around Jupiter? Rick: Got that right, buddy. Tsuneo: Damn. > The mind-link ended. Rick [Brandon]: Damned server crashed again. > Shard shook his head to clear it somewhat. Rebecca [Makes rattling noises] > Shard had noticed that it had gotten dark while he was in the link. Dan [Shard]: Aaagh! I've gone blind! No, wait. That's just my hat falling over my eyes. > Blaze re-opened her eyes. The outline of her crystal was no longer on her > forehead. > "Now you know what happened." Blaze said Rick [Shard]: Could you run it all by me again? I kind of dozed off during the first reel. > "Yes...they were all captured and transformed. Dan: When staff recruitment drives go too far. > I have another question for you... Rick [Shard]: Why is the room going around and around? > What became of the other scientists who were adjusted by these > creatures?" Shard asked. Tsuneo: The Japanese government locked them up and used them to develop telekinetic super-weapons. Dan: They got jobs as checkout clerks at a supermarket. > "Most of them died - they were the lucky ones. Others survived only to be Rick: -Subjected to Total Quality Management. Rebecca: Reorganisations at work? Rick: You got it. They're making us actually work for a living. > twisted by the alien creatures into something evil. Tsuneo: Sideshow clowns! > Some fought against the darkness and won. Dan: There's a song title in that, I'm sure of it. Rebecca: Then it turned out that the Darkness' foot was under the rope, so they reversed it. > They somehow managed to escape. I was one of the few who got > away." Blaze answered. Tsuneo: That's nice... How exactly did you do that and, more importantly, how is it that you're not being controlled by the Radam? > "Unfortunately, now those few are getting fewer and fewer." IceBlade stated. Rebecca: Sort of like the WCW card, really. > "Yes, things are not looking very good for us right now..." Blaze began. > "Why?" Shard asked inquiringly. Tsuneo: Falling share prices, slump in the dollar, election indecision, the usual. > "A very powerful Teknoman has been slaughtering the others. He has managed to > find and kill all of those who will not serve him. The remaining survivors have > gone into hiding, until I find and destroy this Teknoman." Blaze explained. Tsuneo: Gee, that's nice of them. They all run and hide while you do all the work for them. Way to go there, guys. Rick: On the other hand, it's a good amount of disadvantage points. Dan: So is there any reason why this and any other evil Teknomen aren't out destroying the world in the intervening ten or so years? Rick: It's their rostered day off. > "Who is this evil Teknoman?" Shard asked. Dan: For weeks now, we've been asking who is the mysterious Tekkaman who has been stalking Blaze. Tonight, we're going to find out. Rebecca: Yes, this is something so shocking we *have* to see it live on pay per view to believe it. > "He is..." Blaze is about to answer when suddenly everyone's crystal outline > appeared on their foreheads glowing intensely. > "ME!" A voice thundered from the woods. Rebecca: Well thank you Mysterious Voice, but I think they can finish their own sentences. > Everyone stood up and looked around. They couldn't see anything. Rick: Try squinting and focussing on something else. That's how I see Magic Eye pictures. > Then a figure walked out of the tree-line and joined the group. > The newcomer was covered in pitch-black armor that made him look fierce in the > fire light. Rebecca: You can tell he's the bad guy because he's wearing black. Tsuneo [Looks at Rebecca's outfit]: I won't comment on that. Rick: Well, it'd look pretty silly if he was a bad guy in paisley. > He muttered a phrase or something that they couldn't make out, Rick: Um, hello? Towards the microphone. This guy has the acting talent of Stallone. > and > pointed at IceBlade and Shard. Some kind of plant rapidly grew from the ground > around Shard and IceBlade feet, wrapping around them, preventing them from > moving. Dan: How'd he get those to grow so fast? Rebecca: Trust me, you don't want to know what he uses for fertilizer. Dan [Hits her with a cushion]: Thanks for that. > "I cant move!" said Shard struggling with his restraints. > "Same here." replied IceBlade who was also struggling. > "Who are you?" Shard asked. Tsuneo [Tekkaman]: I am... [Dramatic pause] Nasty Person! Rebecca, Rick & Dan: Nasty Person?! Tsuneo: It's pretty obscure. > "I am Tekkaman Shrapnel, and I'll deal with you two once I kill your instructor. > Muwahahaha!" He declares laughing evilly. Dan [Shrapnel as Jeff Garyn]: And I want No Witnesses! Rebecca: This has taken a very Deltaesque turn. > "I have to get free of this somehow." thought shard. He began to struggle even > harder against his restraints. Dan: Gasp with terror as Shard wrestles with a rubber vine! Rick: Shudder in fear as Shard confronts Blaze's past. Tsuneo: Eat popcorn with indifference as Blaze delivers exposition. Rebecca: Recollections of a Teknoman, coming soon to a theatre near you. Not to be taken internally. > "So we meet again Blaze or should I say, Julia. Heh heh heh." Shrapnel said > chuckling quietly. Rick [Shrapnel]: So, we meet again for the first time. > "I don't know who you are/were, or what quarrel you have with me." Blaze told > him. Suddenly Shrapnel's helmet disappeared, revealing his human face. Dan: And what do you know, it's Anakin Skywalker. Rick [Luke Skywalker]: Boy, I'm glad I got all my looks from mum's side of the family. > "Now do you recognize me?" He asked. Rebecca [Julia]: Nnnnnnnnnnope. Not at all. Sorry. > Everyone got a good look at his face. He had fiery red eyes, a cross-shaped scar > on his right cheek, and slightly short black curly hair. Tsuneo: Slightly short hair? > "Matt?!?" gasped Blaze. "Oh my God..." Dan: [Blaze] Where'd you get the scar from? Tsuneo: That's nice. [Pause] Who the hell is this guy? > "WHAT?!?" "No way!" Exclaimed IceBlade and Shard. > "Yes it is I. I am glad that you remember who I am, even after all this time. Tsuneo: That's nice. [Pause] Who the hell is he? Rick: Don't you remember? He was on the ship. Tsuneo: Oh. [Pause] It would be nice if we knew anything about him. > But enough of this, I am here to fight!" Matt/Shrapnel stated as his helmet > reappeared. Tsuneo: That is so rude. You barge on in here, shout at people and then demand a fight. Don't you have any manners, young man? Rick: Didn't I see this in a Jackie Chan movie? Dan: Yeah, all of them. > "Then it's a fight you shall have." Blaze responded pulling out her crystal. > "TEK-POWER!" She yelled. > Blaze was engulfed in a column of orange light Dan: Cool! Fan-service transformation sequence! Tsuneo: Whoever it was who let you watch Tekkaman Blade 2 should be shot. > and she was once again covered in > her brightly colored armor, holding her jeweled staff in an attack position. Rebecca: I suppose it would be too much to ask for the female character not to have bright pastel armour and an actually threatening looking weapon? I thought so. > Blaze activated her jets and charged at her enemy. > "YAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" She yelled her battle cry. > Shrapnel also charged with lance in hand. Rick: Lance in hand? So he's carrying around Lance Storm? Dan: Naw, it's one of the Voltron pilots. > With a loud clang, they clashed. > Sparks dispersed from where their weapons made contact with one another. Rick: Grit those teeth! Grrr! > They > exchanged blows with one another for a while then they broke away from one > another. Rebecca: Charge, clash, break off, take a breather... This is a pretty formulaic fight. I'm just waiting for the rest hold. > Shrapnel charged at Blaze and they began to fight intensely, blocking > each others attacks until finally one of blaze's punches got through and > connected with Shrapnel's head. Rick [Shrapnel, effeminate]: Owwwww! That really, really hurts! > The force of the blow made him stagger back about a half dozen paces. Dan [Shrapnel]: The circle is complete. I am the master now. > "I can't forgive you for what you did to all of the others. I will avenge their > deaths by destroying you!" Blaze shouted, breathing heavily. Tsuneo: Cue the stock dialogue. This is a real paint-by-numbers affair. > "HA! I'd like to see you try." He responded. "You know, the others fell easily > and so will you... Rick [Shrapnel]: I'm Invincible! Rebecca: You're a loonie. > Then I will have the pleasure of crushing the lives of your > comrads! Dan [Shrapnel]: And then I shall crush you like a bug! Crush crush crush stomp stomp stomp squeeze squeeze squeeze! Rick: He's the bad guy. > But first, I will let their suffering begin with letting them watch you > die!" Tsuneo: You're right. This is very Deltaesque. Dan: Do you reckon he's got a 45mm Voltekka Silencer? > "Take this!" Blaze yelled as she brought the jeweled end of her staff to bear on > her adversary. > The jewels on the end of her staff began to glow and the air around Blaze began > to heat up at an incredible rate because of the gathering of energy. Rebecca: Nice move, Blaze, but why didn't you just blast him while he was gloating? > Shrapnel, upon seeing this initiated an energy blast of his own. Dan [Shrapnel]: Super Vegita Big Bang Attack! > "I think not!" He said while aiming his weapon, the blades of his lance glowing > bright red with rapidly accumulated energy, toward Blaze. Rebecca: This whole scene is majorly Freudian, don't you think? > "VOLTEKKA!!!" He yelled. > Red waves of energy shot toward Blaze, just as she finished gathering the energy > for her attack. > "TEKNOBLAST!!!" Blaze yelled, unleashing the torrent of energy that now > encircled the end of her staff. Tsuneo: See? Can't even decide on the names for the attacks between the American and Japanese versions. > Blaze's energy blast shot toward Shrapnel's energy wave. When the two energy > blasts met, the resultant explosion was so bright that everyone was momentarily > blinded. Blaze hoped that hers' was enough to cancel out Shrapnel's. It was not. Rick: No no, don't you know you can't stop a level three Z-ism with a X-ism? > Shrapnel's Voltekka bulldozed through her Teknoblast and engulfed her. Blaze > screamed as it began ripping through her armor... Rebecca [Chirpy]: And you know that's just gotta hurt. > END CHAPTER 3 > Author's Comments: > Poor Blaze, it seems that she's not having a very good day... Rick: She isn't? You mean that being blown up doesn't happen to her every day? > What will become of Shard IceBlade, and does Blaze survive Shrapnel's assault? Dan: Well, unless she's got some plot contrivance on her side, she's crispy critter. > Find out in the next installment of this exciting series! Tsuneo [Bored]: Wow. I can hardly wait. > Well, until then... JA NE! > -------------------------- Tell me your thoughts about this chapter of my story > by emailing me at > autobot_city@hotmail.com [The TV switches off] Rebecca: So how much more of this is there? Voice: Just another two chapters. Dan: It'll be a cinch. Bring 'em on! Voice: Well- Rebecca: No! [she hits Dan with a cushion] Don't encourage him. Dan: C'mon, it's not that tough. Rick: It's all just repetition, really. Dan: Mostly about The Cataclysm. Rick: And how it changed the lives of many people. Tsuneo: You two will be eating those words. Rebecca: Come on, let's go before he does something really dire, like give us all a BGC 2040 fic. [Pause] All: Naaah. [They leave. the screen goes blank.] Voice: Come on, I know they're out there. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Riffed by: Rick R. Mortis (rickr@elmerstudios.com) & Jinas (jinas@elmerstudios.com) Dan and Tsuneo Tateo are copyright 1999-2000 Max Fauth (Jinas) Rebecca Bartley and Rick R. Mortis are copyright 1999-2000 Alex Fauth (Rick R. Mortis). Elmer Studios!: http://www.elmerstudios.com All of Elmer Studios' MSTings, artwork, character profiles, and the Satellite of Rednecks in one spot. Rick's Mecha Madness Page: http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Realm/7194/index.htm Fighters Anthology .lib and mission files, utterly disturbing Nova Satori shrine, the AntiKevs and Fanfic Carp, all in one big steaming pile. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- > "I am Tekkaman Shrapnel, and I'll deal with you two once I kill your instructor. > Muwahahaha!" He declares laughing evilly.